TRANSFER OF POWER, IAS STYLE.

   For bureaucrats these are the best of times, and the worst. On the one hand they rule supreme with all MPs, Ministers, MLAs and judges cowering at home behind their masks, and can lock down millions of people with a stroke of their pens. On the other, they can be  transferred or superseded equally quickly with one spray of the sanitiser if the Corona does not behave itself. For the fact is that our bureaucracy is subject to an even more deadly virus of its own- the GOTCHA (Get Off That Chair) virus- which circulates freely in its bloodstream, pulling down the unwary. This virus targets not the host but his/her post, it mutates with each change of a Prime Minister or Chief Minister, and only a few can develop immunity to it (ask Mr. Khemka, who I believe has been struck down by it at least 45 times so far and is yet to acquire herd immunity to it). Social distancing does not help because it's one's own cadre mates who carry the pathogen. Originally native to politicians, the virus jumped from them to "homo prostratus" (the generic term for Indian bureaucrats) sometime after 1975. It does not kill them, however, it simply makes them hang on to their posts, or hanker after those of other colleagues. There are, however, certain particular moments in one's career when one is most vulnerable to it, as I have learnt through long exposure to it.

   Studies show that 70% of airline accidents take place during the process of landing and take-off. That's because things are most likely to go wrong precisely when  an existing status quo is altered and new dynamics are introduced. It is the same with the civil services, I have noticed: the maximum turbulence occurs at the moment of transfers- the handing over and taking over of charge of a post, a period of transition which has to be handled with extreme care by those piloting the nation, as it were. More often than not, dog fights can break out, for IAS types, like the tiger, are territorial in nature and do not look kindly on rivals trying to elbow their way into a lucrative patch. One must always be on high alert at such moments to preempt a hijack or forcible ejection from the cockpit.

  I myself have generally cruised through my career on auto-pilot, sleeping at the controls, and have not had too many instances to complain about, primarily because I was rarely assigned the greener pastures owing, I must confess, to my proclivity to quote Confucius in my file notings (eg. on a Ministerial diktat to exempt taxis from installing meters - "It takes many nails to build a crib but only one screw to fill it.")  But there will be the odd slip now and then, and sometime in the first decade of this millennium I was, as a result of an oversight by the Chief Minister, posted as Secretary Tourism. Now, Tourism is a much sought after assignment in Himachal- you get to stay in fancy hotels, go abroad for tourism marts, bump into nubile starlets shooting at Manali, obtain a lot of IOUs from important folks in Delhi; why, you may even, like Mr Amitav Kant, become CEO of Niti Ayog on the strength of a well devised slogan like "God's own country!" (even though God himself may be aghast and disown the country). But I hope you get the thrust, as Jack the Ripper was fond of telling his victims.

  I was into my second year in the department, looking forward to an impending tourism mart in Bali, when the government changed and all Secretaries were asked to attend the swearing-in (why do they call it that?) of the new Cabinet in the Raj Bhavan at ten o'clock sharp. I dusted off my "bandh galla", hot footed it to the Raj Bhavan, dutifully wagged my tail at the new Chief Minister and returned to my office to draw my foreign exchange for the Bali trip (I had already purchased the swimming trunks and dark glasses). I should have bought a jock strap, however, for when I entered my room I found a lady officer sitting in my chair, brandishing a transfer order: in a midnight coup our current Prime Minister would be proud of, she had had herself appointed as the Tourism Secretary and had "taken over" while I was singing hosannas to the rising sun in the Governor's mansion. It was a lesson learnt the hard way: always lock your room when going for a swearing in, or at the very least remove the rug so that it cannot be pulled from under your feet. This was my Kamalnath moment and I slunk off to the Ayurveda deptt. (my new posting) for some much needed first aid. I'm told that in later years this enterprising lady tried something similar with the then Chief Secretary. This gentleman, however, had read his Confucius( "Man who bend over backward cannot keep eye on own backside") and lived to wag his tail another day.

   Not every officer, however, is willing to throw in the towel so easily. I recollect a sturdy Sikh gentleman who occupied one of the most sought after posts in Shimla, its office located in a heritage building bang in the middle of the Mall road. He spent a few happy years there and in the fullness of time the day of his retirement dawned. His successor arrived to relieve him of his onerous burden but this gentleman refused to "hand over" charge! He insisted that the Chief Minister had assured him of a six month extension in service, and since he was a trusting kind of fellow, he fully believed the CM's words. Problem was that the Chief Minister was abroad and could not be contacted. The retiree would not heed any advice of his seniors, he locked himself up in his office, brought in his sleeping bag and a shot gun and prepared for a siege, as it were. The Chief Secretary considered sending in an emissary- they are called interlocutors in these Shaheen Bagh days- to reason with him but, given that he was almost seven feet tall and weighed 200 pounds with or without his jock straps, no volunteer was forthcoming- there are, after all, no gallantry awards in the IAS, only reemployment, but one has to be in one piece to avail of that, you understand. The impasse lasted almost a week: it ended when the officer's PA (Personal Assistant) informed him that he would get neither pay nor pension for this period, for he was neither in service nor retired, neither fish nor fowl- a bit like that old Ajit joke about a guy hung upside down with his head  in a jar half full of water: " Paani tumhe jeene nahi dega aur oxygen tumhe marne nahi dega." The crisis was quickly resolved and the reluctant retiree hauled himself off to Punjab where he raises broilers, but now he makes it a point to count his chickens only after they are hatched.

   And then there was the case of the income tax officer who had devised his own " shukrana" slabs for favourably deciding assessment cases, colloquially known as "sircharge" because the proceeds went to "sir" and not to the govt. This accounting sub-head was not regarded well at headquarters and he was placed under suspension. The chappie, however, had a trick or two up his own sleeve: he collected a dozen or so pending files and had himself admitted to an obliging private hospital where he promptly went into a self induced coma. This coma amounted to a full stop for the department, however, because the officer was now in no position to hand over his charge and, more important, the files of his office! No inquiry was possible in this limbo. The stalemate continued for a few weeks. Once in a while, when no visitors were allowed, the officer would surreptitiously emerge from his coma, sign a couple of files to extract some more "sircharge", and promptly relapse into a coma. I am not aware how this saga finally ended, but I would not be surprised if he has by now joined a major political party where such skills are in great demand.

  One could do no better than end this piece with another Confucius quote: "Bureaucrat in coma is pain in the colon."

THE LOCK DOWN DIARIES( XIII ): WHAT INDIA NEEDS IS NERD IMMUNITY.

   Well informed that we have all become , thanks to the lock down, most of us are by now aware of the concept of herd immunity. But I may as well explain for those simple minded twits who acquire all their information from Republic TV and the rantings of Rahul Shivshankar  on Times Now. It is a variation of herd instinct which drives a horde of a like minded species to do something stupid. Like lemmings jumping off a cliff and committing suicide by the thousands, or Indian voters doing the same in 2014 and yet again in 2019. Those who survive such cataclysmic events acquire herd immunity and do not fall prey to them again. Or at least that is what the epidemiologists, particularly in India, are hoping with the big C since nothing else is working- not the lockdown or police dandas or Man ki Baat. That is also what the Congress is hoping for, but that is a story for another day.

  We shall ultimately acquire herd immunity against the virus and so that is not my concern. What I worry about is this: when shall we acquire NERD immunity, a permanent protection from the nerd mentality and statements which are gradually taking over this country like some locust swarm and blanketing us with regurgitated crap? Of late our exposure to this kind of nerdity ( a word I claim as copyright  as it reflects sanctimonious fatuity and dissembling on a large scale) has reached dangerous levels. Even the courts appear to have fallen victim to it.

  It takes a special kind of genius to see the horses bolting, to do nothing about it, and then lock the stable after all the horses are a distant memory. And yet that is precisely what our apex court did: it rejected three early and desperate petitions to do something about the migrants trudging back to their villages, but then decided two months later to exorcise the niggling doubts in its collective conscience by ordering the government to provide transport for them. The only problem was that by then ( according to the govt's own admission) 67 lakhs of them had already been sent back by trains. A few more undocumented millions had reached their homes on their own, and a few hundreds had perished unsung on the way. This was certainly not an intervention which adds to the court's diminishing glory.

  Consider next the nerdity of our Railways. It "lost" about 70 Shramic Special trains, i.e. trains which wandered hundreds of kilometers off course and landed up in stations they were not supposed to, a mystery not unlike MH 370 , except that they were ultimately found. The Railway Minister explained that these trains were diverted on alternative routes since the direct lines were over congested. It would take another nerd to swallow this drivel. We have a rail system that runs 20000 trains every day, and yet it is supposed to be over burdened by just a couple of hundred trains, at a time when the lockdown was in force and NO passenger trains were running? Mr. Goyal must really think that Indians are all stupid. ( Actually, come to think of it, he may just be right- didn't we believe that Mr. Modi would set China right? Or was it Nepal?)

  The RWAs in our cities exemplify the power of nerdity in gated communities. They are ruled by tin pot dictators, usually retired middle level chappies who were pushed around during their stifled careers and now have a chance to show some atmanirbharta. Having pushed out all their domestic support staff to starve on the roads, they next brought all their petty artillery to bear on those residents who were suspected or proven Covid patients, and stigmatised them like the lepers of yore. Read the mortifying story on the op-ed page of the Hindustan Times of 14.6.2020. It is by one Dr. Upendra Kaul, an eminent cardiac surgeon and a Padma Shri to boot. Titled I HAD COVID 19. AND SOCIETY DECIDED TO STIGMATISE ME: it describes his demeaning treatment at the hands of his RWA and neighbours. And these same RWAs now want the govt. in Delhi to again impose a lock down! They are concerned about only their own middle-class "safety" and the country's economy and the remaining 800 million people can go to hell. The solid voting block that they constitute, is it any wonder we are where we are as a nation?

  The last time I looked at our tattered constitution we were a union of 32 states and union territories, give or take a couple destined for reorganisation by Mr. Amit Shah, and we could travel freely between them in search of jobs, vacations, brides and cheaper booze. But it took just one invisible virus to undo all of Sardar Patel's hard work in 1947: we are now a smorgasbord of containment areas, red, orange and green zones, sealed borders, captive labourers. Enthused by a heady cocktail of power, a comatose judiciary, a suspended democratic process and dubious advisors, Chief Ministers are busy "sealing off" their states whenever they hear someone sneeze or cough. Haryana, Delhi and UP do it every third day in turns. Tamil Nadu built a seven foot high wall on its border with Karnataka, without waiting for Mexico to pay for it. UP and Rajasthan cops even got into a scuffle about people entering/ exiting their respective areas, in a eerie prelude to the Galwan valley and Pangong Tso face-off . ( China probably reasoned that if these guys do it all the time they won't even notice if we do so too. They were right, we didn't.)  Mr. Kejriwal even attempted to prevent people from other states coming to Delhi for medical treatment till he was reminded that he too is a Haryanvi and not a Delhi-ite. This governance by sealant and adhesive, however, achieved nothing except inflicting untold misery on families, supply chains, businesses and employees: all these states continue to witness huge jumps in infections, probably because the virus refuses to show its aadhar card or proof of residence- hum kagaz nahin dikhayenge.

  There is no end to the nerd wisdom we have been exposed to in recent times. The legal burden of the state is carried on the quaking shoulders of a Solicitor General who is actually a birder- his knowledge of vultures is unmatched, even though he can't tell the real from the imagined ones. An ex union Minister who fancies herself as an animal activist and an environmentalist gives a communal colour to the death of an elephant and weeps copious tears for it, but is blind to the wanton destruction of tens of thousands of hectares of forest and hundreds of species by her own govt. Another union Minister ( where does Mr. Modi find such rare specimens, even by the abyssal standards of his party?) has assured the nation that we can make China eat humble pie if we ourselves stop eating Chinese food. No wonder poor Jawaharlal Nehru couldn't defeat them in 1962- there was no Chinese food in India back then, you see. By the way, this is the same worthy who penned that hit song " Go, corona,go!" which has busted all charts and taken India to no. 4 in the Corona Hit Parade.
  The nerds have been going from strength to strength. The ICMR and the Ministry of Health continue to reiterate that India has not entered the community spread phase, even though we are hitting 13000 cases every day ( according to a leading epidemiologist our daily cases are nearer 50000 and will reach 200,000 by end July.) But hold on! maybe the mandarins are right. They are probably waiting for Lakshadweep to record its first case before announcing community spread. Isn't it part of our great Indian community, and how can we leave it out? All for one and one for all, after all.

  Our official mouthpieces too have made themselves at home in nerd land. The MEA spokesperson tells us one day that the Chinese are on their side of the LAC and we are on our's, and all is hunky dory. The next day we are told the two are disengaging! As Col Ajai Shukla pointed out with irrefutable logic: how do you disengage without first engaging? Similarily,  we were informed after the bloody fracas at Galwan on the 15th night that all Indian soldiers are "accounted for" ; the next day it is tom-tommed that the govt has managed to secure the release of 10 Indian soldiers captured by the PLA! This is precisely the kind of  creative"accounting" that made Mallya, Choksi, Nirad Modi et- al multi billionaires, but as you know, it didn't do much for the country. On being questioned by Rahul Gandhi the External Affairs Minister "clarified" that our soldiers were armed but protocols prevented them from using the weapons when they were being killed. Surely, we have found the successor to the Dalai Lama now- Mr. Jaishanker combines in himself the pacifism of Mahatma Gandhi and the corporeal emancipation of the Buddha. All that remains to anoint him now is to send him to the LAC in Ladakh, introduce him to some PLA thugs and wait for him to turn the other cheek. And once he climbs out of the Galwan river and is appointed the Dalai Lama, we can claim sovereignty over Tibet, for if you have the sovereign, you have the sovereignty. Let's see how the Global Times wriggles out of that MEA logic! 

  We have faced many viruses during our time and have gradually acquired immunity against them. But the virus of nerdity sweeping the country for the last few years, and its exponential growth, is straining our immune system to its limit. It is time to remember Martin Luther King's wise advice: "Nothing in all the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity." It is as important for the country to develop an immunity to nerdity as it is against Covid. My humble request to these nerds is to  take pity on us and remember that confronting stupidity can be as painful as death: when you're dead you don't know you're dead- the pain is felt by others. The same thing happens when you're stupid.

THE LOCKDOWN DIARIES ( XII): HIMACHAL'S TOURISM DILEMMA AND THE PARABLE OF THE THIRD BIRD.

  These are uncharted times for the tourism and hotel industries and most states are struggling to devise a road map for their recovery. Himachal, however, appears to have gone into a panic and has been pressing all the wrong buttons so far, further confounding an already confusing situation.

  At the beginning of the month the Chief Minister announced that the state would promote "Quarantine tourism" in a big way to leverage its pollution free environment. The near unanimous howls of protests, mainly from the citizens and hoteliers of Himachal itself, quickly put paid to that idea. Then, with Unlock I coming into effect, new rules for opening hotels were announced.  They stipulated that hotels could host only business travellers, govt officials on duty and local residents; no tourists from outside. Strangely, it did not occur to the govt. that with businesses closed there would be few corporate clients, that govt officials stayed in govt rest houses, and that locals were unlikely to frequent hotels because they had their own houses, thank you. There was, obviously, little point in opening hotels on these conditions.The howling resumed and the rules were again modified.

  But it is a fundamental rule of administration that bad ideas come in batches, and the fresh guidelines would have done MAD magazine proud. On the 4th of June it was decreed that tourists could stay in hotels but they could not go site seeing, shopping or stroll outside; if they did either or both the hotelier and the tourist would be prosecuted. It would be the hotel's responsibility to screen them medically and disallow people with fever, cough and cold, kidney and lung conditions. All guests would be served "kadha" twice a day and the hotel's menu would be drawn up by the Health Deptt. This time, tired of howling, the various hotel associations announced that they had had enough, and decided they would not open their properties till August. They stated that since the season was already over there was no point in opening up now; I suspect they were just being polite and had offered the govt two more months to get rid of the cobwebs in its collective brain, probably because the said organ had not been used during the long lock down.

   Tourism is vital for Himachal, providing 10% of its GDP and employment to 400000 people, and therefore merits a well thought out strategy to revive it in the midst of the pandemic, because the post pandemic period may be more than a year away and waiting till then is not an option. But the state is not seizing the unique opportunity which the pandemic has presented it on a petri-dish. Whenever internal tourism resumes, people would be wary of going to urban settings and congested tourist hot spots; there are not going to be any international tourists for the next two years at least . Indians too are not likely to go vacationing abroad, except perhaps for the likes of Mallya and Choksi. Our tourism would be driven by domestic tourists and the expected decline in the number of domestic tourists ( 1600 million in 2018) would be partly offset by those who used to go abroad . The numbers will be there, and Himachal, with its cool climate, green cover and relatively uncongested landscape would be just what the tourist would be seeking after months of lockdowns, restrictions and the fear of infection. But the govt. has to think sensibly, start planning for it right away and launch an aggressive publicity campaign nationally. It has till September at least to do so and should therefore avoid hasty, ill advised, knee jerk strokes of genius.

                                     

                     [  Phlach valley, Kullu.   Promote tourism here............]    Photo Avay Shukla.

                                [ Shimla...........Not here]                     Photo courtesy Amar Ujala.

  In my view, with COVID infections yet to peak and likely to continue well into the next year, the govt should not open up the whole state at one go for tourism and hotels. It needs to come up with a graded plan with a time horizon of six to ten months and reintroduce tourism in a calibrated manner. Secondly, this is a once in a life time opportunity for the state to clean up its tourism infrastructure mess, bring the thousands of unlicensed units under a regulatory regime, enhance significantly its tourism revenues and reduce the overcrowding in its clogged up towns and cities. This is what I would suggest:

[1]  In Phase 1 only hotels, home stays and adventure sport units ( trekking, river rafting, para gliding, snow boarding, angling) located outside urban centers ( Municipal Corporations, Municipal Committees, Notified Area Committees) should be allowed to open. Smaller conurbations and rural areas are much safer from the Covid infection:it has been established that open areas are less likely to spread the contagion. Opening up the towns and cities where the potential for infection is higher would be inviting disaster. In 2018 Himachal received 18 million tourists; if even 25% of that come this year, it would still be a lot- 4.50 million- and cities like Shimla, Manali and Dharamsala would again be overrun with these hordes. It would not be possible to test such large numbers at the borders ( nor should this be done for then nobody will want to come) and could therefore lead to another wave of cases.
[2]  Both supply side and demand side factors favour rural tourism as the initial thrust area. Potential tourists would prefer to go to areas which are open, uncluttered, with low population density and provide nature based activities. This has been the international experience also so far in countries which have begun to open up. From the supply side, smaller units with low overheads and loans would find it easier to restart operations; this is especially true of home stays and B+B units, most of which are family run and offer upto five rooms. Their reopening would revive rural livelihoods on a large scale.

[3]  Only registered hotels and home stays should be allowed to take in guests. According to the Tourism Deptt figures the state has 3679 registered hotels and 2189 approved home stays; but at least a similar number in both categories are running illegally. ( My own village, Puranikoti near Mashobra, has a number of the latter!). Since all hospitality units would have to follow a strict health, hygiene and record keeping protocol now for the foreseeable future, the Deptt. can no longer afford to have units below its radar. All unregistered units should be given a one month period to register themselves. The Directorate should upload the details of all registered units on its website. Tourists should be advised, and warned, to make bookings only in units listed on the website. In fact, the Tourism Deptt. could also consider whether it should be made mandatory to have a prior booking before being allowed to enter the state. ( This last aspect would have to be weighed against the visitors' convenience).

   The corollary advantage of ensuring registration for all hotels/ homestays would be an updating of the Deptt's records, flushing out of the illegal units, and a considerable increase in the govt's revenues from taxes and levies which they were hitherto not paying. It will also result in better regulation and a better experience for the tourists.

[3]  The hotels and home stays in urban areas could be allowed to open up in the second phase, only when the infection rate ( both nationally and in the state) has shown a decline for at least a fortnight and the absolute numbers have also come down significantly. As with the rural hotels/ home stays, only registered units should be given the benefit of Unlock 1 or 2 and their data uploaded on the Tourism Deptt website. It is to be expected that the hotel associations would not take kindly to this, but this is a time to display resolute leadership not populism, to prioritize scientific data and sound planning over votes. There would perhaps no need to insist on prior booking now since the pandemic would already be on the decline.
[4]  In the third, long term phase, the state should review its entire tourism policy to align it with the carrying capacity of various destinations, especially its main cities. The thrust should be to move away from urban tourism to rural, nature based tourism and eco tourism. Sub standard and illegal units in urban areas should be closed down, home stays which are operating in urban locations in violation of the policy should be penalised, no new hotel licenses should be issued for cities like Shimla, Manali, Kullu, Dharamshala, Palampur, Solan etc which have far exceeded their carrying capacity, new policies should be formulated for the rural destinations like the idyllic valleys of Tirthan, Parbati, Sangla and places like Chitkul, Barot, Jalori, Prashar, Triund, Holi, Narkanda, Mashobra etc. to prevent them from going the way of the other cities. Because if these places are destroyed then Himachal would have lost its crown jewels. As I said earlier this is a good time to clean up; the govt. now has the time, the authority and the justification to do so and it must not miss the bus now. 

  A calibrated opening up is what tourism in Himachal needs for it to be sustainable in both the short and long terms. There will be some opposition to a partial and staggered opening up, but our leaders must realise that there is a time to follow, and a time to lead. To make haste slowly. It is relevant here to remember the parable of Noah. When the Great Flood subsided after 40 days, Noah did not rush out in glee because he still did not know whether there was any land left out there. He sent out a bird, and it was only after the third bird did not return that Noah knew it was now time to step out! Himachal should wait for that third bird before abandoning ship.

THE LOCK DOWN DIARIES (XI)- THE NEXT PANDEMIC COULD WELL BE " MADE IN INDIA"

  So narrowly focused are we on the pandemic that two environmental milestones have gone unnoticed. One, the 50th Earth Day has come and gone on the 22nd of April, 2020: did any one even notice amidst the collective delirium of beating pots and pans and lighting diyas? Two,on January 23, 2020, the Doomsday Clock in Washington DC ( which calculates the time remaining for the seventh global extinction) was moved to 100 seconds to midnight ( the zero hour). So imperiled is the future of our planet, and so rapid the environmental destruction, that scientists have removed the minute hand and the countdown now is in seconds. Not only are the sands of time running out, they are running out faster than we had anticipated.

  COVID 19 may be an indication that the after- burners of Armageddon have been ignited. Notwithstanding Whatsapp conspiracy theories, there is a near unanimous global consensus among scientists ( Mr. Gadkari does not count as one) that this is a zoonotic disease, i.e. that it has been transmitted from animals to humans, like Ebola, SARS, MERS, NIPAH etc. Equally, there is now an emerging consensus that zoonosis is becoming more rampant because of the ruthless and widespread destruction of natural habitats. The National Geographic in a 2019 report establishes a definite link between COVID and planetary depredation:  "Rampant deforestation, uncontrolled expansion of agriculture, mining and infrastructure development, and exploitation of wild species have created perfect conditions for spillover of diseases from wildlife to humans.... There is an inextricable link between human health and the health of the planet, its ecosystems and its non-human living creatures." How strong can this link be when we extinguish about 2000 species every year, and have driven almost one million species to the point of near extinction?

  The resurgence of nature during these last few months only underscores the point that the natural environment should be given a chance to recoup, to repair itself; that there must be social distancing between natural habitats and human activities too; that forests, rivers, wetlands, mangroves, mountains must be left undisturbed so that the wild life in them do not come into conflict with humans, so that the estimated 1.97 million viruses still undetected in the wild do not further spill into human spaces. Most countries are beginning to absorb this scientifically undeniable truth, but not India.

  Our current stock of myopic leaders, focused exclusively on a five trillion dollar economy and winning in 2024, are taking the country down the path to destruction. Even before the pandemic India was the fourth worst performing country in the Environmental Performance Index, at 177 out of 180 countries. But instead of using this man made calamity to review its environmental approval policies it has seized the opportunity to further devastate our remaining natural habitats and to give a free hand to industry to plunder them for maximising profits.

  The long lock down has been a blessing for the Ministry of Environment and Forests which has become unarguably the biggest threat to our natural environment today. This was a period to have suspended all environmental approvals because the prescribed process- site visits, detailed ground surveys, public hearings, consultation with experts and stakeholders- cannot be possible in a locked down environment. But, in a perversity not expected of a responsible government, this is exactly when the MOEF and its subsidiary NBWL ( National Board for Wildlife) have decided to fast track approvals through video conferencing. Cases which took days to examine and deliberate upon are now disposed off in ten minutes, invariably in favour of the project proponents.

  At just one meeting on the 7th of April 2020- in the middle of the lockdown- the NBWL Standing Committee cleared 31 proposals in just a few hours; these include 15 projects that hugely affect Tiger reserves, elephant reserves and other Protected Areas. With lightening speed the MOEF too accorded its approval within a week on 15th April, probably to forestall any legal challenges. None of these projects were subjected to the rigours of a proper environmental approval process.

  Among the projects approved just during the lock down are the following major ones:

* A railway bridge through the Kawal tiger reserve in MP.

* A highway in Goa through the Mollar Wild Life Sanctuary.

* Nagpur- Mumbai super highway involving the felling of 32000 trees.

* Transfer of 700 ha of forest land in Rajaji National Park in Uttarakhand for organising the Kumbh Mela next year.

* A virtual green nod for the 3097 MW Etalin HEP in the pristine Dibang Valley of Arunachal Pradesh. This means the transfer of 1150.08 ha of forest land and the slaughter of 270000 trees. The valley is a priceless bio-diversity hotspot containing the following species: plants(413), butterflies(159), spiders(113), amphibians(14), reptiles(31), birds(230), mammals(21, including tigers).

* Coal mining over 98.59 ha of forest land in the Dehing Patkai Elephant Reserve in Assam. One of India's last remaining tropical forests, this reserve is home to 600 elephants, 40 mammal species, 300 bird species, 100 types of orchids, 150 butterflies and 40 types of reptiles. What is astounding is that Coal India has been mining this area illegally, without any approvals, for the last fifteen years, and its criminality has now been condoned with this permission!

* The Karnataka Wild Life Board on 20th March cleared the hugely destructive Hubbali- Ankola railway line through the fragile Western Ghats. This will involve diversion of 595.64 forest land and 184.60 ha of wetlands, and the felling of 220000 trees. No attention has been paid to the earlier Kasturirangan and Gadgil reports on declaring the WG as an eco-sensitive zone, or the fact that these forests are the source of 65 rivers, or that the ghats are the habitat of 2500 species of plants and animals, or that a much more environment friendly alternative route was available. Even more shocking is the fact that this project had been rejected twice earlier by two expert committees of the National Wild Life Board.

*  The Rs. 20000 crore Central Vista project in the heart of Delhi has been accorded environmental and land use change approvals with extraordinary speed; even the Supreme court, as is expected these days, has given it its nod. An ill conceived monument to one man's vainglory, the project will demolish history, heritage, culture and the environment of the world's most polluted city in one fell swoop. Non govt. experts say it will result in removal of 2000 trees, reduction of green area by 9% and diversion of at least 65 acres of public use land for govt. offices. 25 acres of the Yamuna flood plains will also be diverted. This is folly and insanity on a megalomaniac scale at a time when cities across the world are trying to create more green lungs and public spaces for their citizens.

  It is evident from this doomsday list that the state governments are just as culpable and uncaring as the union government. And they will no doubt welcome also the MOEF's latest assault on the few remaining environmental regulations: the proposed amendments to the Environment Protection Act. Notified on 12.3. 2020, these draft amendments will rip the heart out of this legislation. It proposes, inter-alia:

[1] A post facto grant of approval to an EIA ( Environment Impact Approval) if one had not been obtained earlier! This not only legalises a criminality but also flies in the teeth of judgments of the Supreme Court and the National Green Tribunal which had strongly disapproved of this idea.

[2] A project developer who has violated any environmental condition or rule can now simply compound his illegality by paying a fine. There will now be no deterrence left.

[3] Public consultations and hearings, which are a lengthy process, have now been limited to a maximum of 40 days. This is patently ridiculous because most major projects are located in remote areas where it takes two weeks even to deliver a notice to someone. This clause is designed to stifle the voices of local populations and to deny them an opportunity to oppose a project.

[4] Even worse, certain types of projects have been completely exempted from the need of conducting any public hearings: chemical fertilisers, metallurgical units, pesticides, petroleum, graphite, synthetic chemicals, Effluent treatment plants, bio-medical waste treatment, all building and construction projects, highways, irrigation projects, power transmission lines. Anyone can see that these are among the most toxic and environmentally damaging types of industries, but they are proposed to be given a free run.

Scientists, environmentalists, wild life researchers, enlightened citizens have all protested against this surreptitious move to smuggle through a retrograde piece of legislation at a time when various restrictions make it impossible for people to travel, meet, consult or debate and have asked the MOEF to defer the exercise till normalcy returns. The government, however, is not listening and is determined to drive in this final nail in our ecological coffin. Ironically, this is happening precisely when 30 major countries recently met at the 11th edition of the Petersburg Climate Dialogue on April 27th-28th, to discuss how to move to a greener trajectory of development in the post pandemic era. The issue is no longer about "maintaining a balance" between nature and development, it is now about "correcting and restoring" the balance in favour of the former. But we of course were in a state of mental lock down.

  There is by now more than enough incontrovertible evidence to tie together habitat destruction, climate change, zoonotic diseases and the current pandemic. It was to find a way out of this vicious cycle that the Petersburg conference was held. But these concerns are just not on the govt's list of priorities: they can be damned as long as the GDP keeps rising and elections can be won by demagoguery. In just the last one month we have had one heat wave, two cyclones and one locust swarm, all linked to climate change: one wonders what more the government needs to wake up from its slumber.

  This govt's respect for the environment is limited to solar alliances, grand rhetoric, posturing on international fora and winning dubious prizes.  This pandemic should have been an opportunity to move towards a " green development" model but this govt. is using it, and the untramelled power it has provided, to further push back the boundaries of natural habitats, endanger hundreds of species, create more human-animal conflict, and prepare the ground for the next pandemic. The ultimate Made In India virus.

  

THE LOCKDOWN DIARIES (X)- THE ENLIGHTENING FRUITS OF "TAPASYA"

  We have a lot to thank the C-virus and the lock down for. I'm not speaking here of its environmental benefits- that subject we shall set aside for a later date in the manner of the Supreme Court setting aside the matter of violation of fundamental rights by the govt. for a more "appropriate time." That is, if we survive the virus, both the Chinese one and the mysterious " Indian" one recently referred to by the Nepalese PM. Ever since our lockdown, now christened "tapasya", started I have been marveling at the surge of creativity among our populace, both the rulers and the ruled.

  Heading this list of ideators, like Abu ben Adam, is none other than my own Chief Minister, Shri Jai Ram Thakur of Himachal, not to be confused with the other " Sholay" Thakur who is wont to urge people to use dissenters for target practice. Anguished by the collapse of tourism which accounts for almost 10% of the state GDP, the CM sought to promote what he called " Quarantine Tourism"- that is, anyone anywhere who has to go into isolation should come to Himachal whose hotels would be overjoyed to receive these possible carriers of the virus in their thousands. They could recover-or die- in the shadow of the mountains and in the lap of nature. Unfortunately, those already ensconced in the said lap- the local janta- refused to allow the state to become a petri dish or Dr. Lal's Pathlap, as it were, and have rejected the CM's epiphany. We will probably hear no more of this bright idea whose time, regrettably, has not yet come. But the matter should not end there; as the vicar told the choir boy: we should get to the bottom of it. Because my concern is this: if the idea was Mr. Thakur's alone, we can handle it. But if someone suggested it to him, that would mean there are TWO such geniuses on the loose in the state, and that would be a catastrophe. Some contact tracing is called for here, methinks.

  Did Malaysia Tourism have a better idea, or was it targeting a, well, niche segment, when it put up this poster at one of its airports?

                                     

                                 

                                         

                                 

One has seen many forms of welcome but this does sound rather out-of the- jocks. I am not aware of the response to this ad campaign, or whether tourists are bending over backwards ( perhaps forwards in this case) to rush to Malaysia , or whether the country even has the logistical wherewithal to provide this special welcome. But I suspect that Malaysia needs one of two consultants: Mr. Shashi Tharoor if the operative word in that ad is a spelling mistake, or a Mr. Suhel Seth type to suggest a less intrusive form of welcome. In any case, my earnest hope is that the Himachal Chief Minister doesn't get to see this poster for it doesn't take much for flights of fancy to take off these days.

  Swiftly moving from the anal to the mathematical, I have to admit that my maths is no better than our Finance Minister's, even though, unlike her, I know the difference between a stimulus and a joke. I have been unable to grasp the significance of a term much in vogue these days- "exponential growth". Does it mean, for example, a double, or triple or quadruple increase ? Was it discovered by Einstein or Newton? ( I must remember to ask Mr. Piush Goel, our Railway Minister, when I meet him next at Gorakhpur or Ranchi or Rourkela, the most likely destinations for a Shramic Special intended for Siwan). But I am no longer ignorant about the concept itself, thanks to the tapasya and the opportunity it has given a friend, who has a roving eye( and hands), to explain it to me. For the sake of clarity, and to obviate the need for any clarifications a-la- Ministry of Home Affairs, I reproduce verbatim his explanation:

 " Suppose a guy, who has COVID, has a torrid affair with a girl and passes on the infection to her, that would be incremental growth of the disease. The girl, a bit of a mover and shaker herself, happens to be simultaneously carrying on with two other Lotharios and infects them too: that would be mathematical growth. One of these two men has two other girl friends and passes on the virus to them, that is geometrical growth. One of these girls, who takes "work from home" quite literally, has three other lusty boy friends and makes them count. Three more COVID patients. So now, in the time it takes to lay me down, we have gone from one to eight- that, old chap, is exponential growth."

  Nothing like a dash of sex to make things amply clear. But I have a suggestion for the government: distribute a pack of condoms with each mask to prevent a sexponential growth of population by next year.

   But credit must be given where it is due: the government has been wonderfully creative in suspending troublesome rules and obstacles in the way of combating the virus, and I am not referring to the suspension of those Delhi officers who sent buses to Anand Vihar to transport those migrants, or that poor IAS chap in Karnataka who felt the workers deserved a better deal. The govt. has suspended DA instalments for one year, some states have suspended those pesky labour laws which, we now learn, were the real culprits holding back the five trillion dollar economy, even the Supreme Court appears to have suspended fundamental rights in the larger interest of the nation. But the most significant of all is depicted below:

                                                           

                                         

This , to me, is the most progressive decision taken so far. It is a reform of monumental proportions. This activity took up most of the time of employees in both the public and private sectors; its suspension will now make them "atmanirbhar" and we can now put our shoulder to the wheel, and the money where the mouth is ( or used to be). instead of the reverse. But as usual I still have a doubt: has this ass kissing been suspended with prospective effect or retrospectively? Will the practice be restored once the virus has been shown the door, and will the poor slobs have to make up for the foregone kisses during the suspension period? Does it apply to politicians as well? Will the practice be reintroduced when the good days and the currently locked down posteriors return? Weighty questions which, I have no doubt, the NITI AYOG will address once it figures how it messed up on the economy and just about everything else it has handled so far.