Now that we have an idea of what Mr. Modi looks like at the stroke of the midnight hour, and have also learnt how to install a teleprompter on a mobile phone, let us move on to some other aspects of the Jantar Mantar protests not yet reported upon. Nothing better exhibits, or symbolises, the decline of our republic and its leadership quality than a comparison of two of our Prime Ministers speaking at the midnight hour to the nation. On August 14, 2047, Jawaharlal Nehru, India's first Prime Minister, delivered to the world his iconic and immortal speech about India's tryst with destiny, acknowledged to be among the finest words ever uttered by any statesman- a speech brimming over with pride, a sense of achievement, vision and hope for a new-born country. On the midnight of 23rd of July, 2026, our current Prime Minister, Mr. Modi, too delivered a short video speech via his mobile phone, not to celebrate his country's freedom but to dig himself out of a hole of his own making- a jaded address reeking of insincerity, dissimulation, empty promises . Whereas Nehru's words electrified a whole nation, Mr. Modi's words, deservedly, will be remembered only by his speech writers- with, one hopes, a lot of mortification. Hopefully we will not find them in our NCERT history books now that Mr. Pradhan is himself history, but one can never be sure.
Every joke, said George Orwell, is a revolution. And oh,boy! was he right! For the CJP (Cockroach Janata Party) did begin life as a joke. The inadvertent raconteur was none other than our own Chief Justice of India, the venerable and Honourable Surya Kant . For it was his wisecrack equating the youth to cockroaches (Hahaha) that brought the invincible cockroaches from out of the chinks and cracks of the country into which this government's policies had shoved them, and into the arena of politics and public protests, bringing to its knees one of the most formidable political parties and authoritarian governments in the world. And the Hon' CJI did not rest for a moment on his laurels, or his funny bone- he further immortalised his constitutional credentials by initially refusing to entertain a mention in court by a lawyer to look into the use of excess force on protesters on the 20th July by the Delhi police (since denied). Notwithstanding the over-whelming visual evidence available in the public domain, he was reported to have said that he did not have the time to watch videos of the police violence. (Another joke- Hahaha!) This naturally enraged the youngsters to greater heights of determination, culminating in the government throwing in the blood-soaked towel on the 25th July. Which is why I feel that Gen XYZ (I can never figure out which is the appropriate alphabet for the current Gen) has failed to give due credit to the Hon CJI for its historic success . But they can still make amends: our local village idiot has suggested that the acronym CJP should now be read as the Chief Justice Party. That, according to him, would deservedly recognize Hon Surya Kant's contributions to the preservation of democracy and the idea of justice in India. Being an idiot of long standing, however, he is not aware that this may constitute contempt of court, and that that is one power the courts are still willing to exercise. Hence, the clown's suggestion has been rejected and he has been removed from his post. he went without any fuss and no lathi charge was needed to persuade him. The village drunkard suggested the moniker Cocktail Janata Party as it better reflects the mix of youthful spirits at Jantar Mantar; this found favour with most of us (except the Excise Inspector), and has been forwarded to Mr. Dipke.
Coming now to Mr. Pradhan's resignation letter. Now, in my career I have seen many resignation letters, including one which said: "Dear sir, I quit. Please accept my sympathies for your loss." In one instance the chappie came with a band and dancers to hand over his resignation letter: this oddity is normal in my Himachal, whether it is resignation, retirement or suspension! Here, they just need an excuse to uncork the "angoori", form a circle and start gyrating, clockwise for retirements and anti-clockwise for resignations. But Mr. Pradhan's resignation letter takes the (cow-dung) cake for its sheer effrontery.
It is not a resignation, it is a treatise, a CV and a character/commendation certificate all rolled into one. It is the farewell speech no one bothered to give him and reminds me of that doleful Jim Reeves song: "I missed me, how I missed me at your home last night..." Substitute "your home" with "my office" and the Minister could have made a musical video of it and earned lavish praise from Gen RDX and Shakira. As it is , no one could figure out whether it was a resignation or an application for sainthood. As someone said, all he needed to write was: "Bro, I fu**ed up big time. Gotta go." It would have been the honest truth, with no scope for ambiguity. Never mind though, maybe the next Minister could use this when his or her time comes.
And finally, what can one (an unabashed admirer) say of Ms. Kangana Runout? Although situated in seismic zone VI, Himachal had no volcanoes till 2024. Then Ms. Runout exploded onto the scene, and since then she has erupted regularly, covering her own face and that of her party with ashes and soot. She is one natural disaster the NDF is not equipped to handle, and for which the Finance Commissions provide no compensation to the state. After her experience with the farmers' agitation , why on earth would she repeat it by vilifying and insulting the brave young girls at Jantar Mantar? My wife, Neerja, with the perspicacity that only women possess, has an explanation: Kangana is actually a Gandhian; having been slapped on one cheek by a Sikh lady police constable last year, she now wants to be slapped on the other one too, completing a virtuous circle as it were. She'll probably get her wish soon- God never disappoints the devout or the Runout.
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