CONVERTING A STATE INTO REAL ESTATE.

 

[ A slightly shorter version of this blog was published in THE TRIBUNE on 27.09.2026 under the heading HOW LOOPHOLES ARE CONVERTING A STATE INTO REAL ESTATE].

In response to a recent blog of mine about unregulated constructions in Himachal, a discerning reader commented that he had done an online search for available properties in the state, and to his horror, found that 23450 properties were advertised for sale/ rent/ lease between just Shimla and Narkanda, a stretch of just 90 kms or so. Even allowing for double counting, these figures tell a tale which our policy makers would do well to listen to, and heed. For what they tell us is that faulty policies, lack of vision or understanding of economics are making Himachal prime real estate, up for grabs by whoever has the money and connections to exploit the system. But some background first.

Land is a precious commodity in Himachal, for the utilisable land is less than 15% of its geographical area- 8 lakh hectares against a total of 55.67 lakh hectares, the rest being forests, "gair mumkin" or areas above the tree line where nothing grows; the actual area under agriculture is even less- just about 5.25 lakh hectares. Farming is almost at subsistence level, the average land holding is 0.94 hectares (in Punjab it is 3.64 ha), small and marginal farmers hold 89% of the arable land. Industry is almost non-existent and the state has one of the highest unemployment rates in the country. For all these reasons , as Nirmanyu Chauhan and Divyanshu Thakur put it so eloquently in their article in the WIRE (8.3.2026), land in this state is not just a commodity, it is a source of dignity, livelihood and autonomy. And security.

Himachal's first Chief Minister, YS Parmar, had the vision to realise this and therefore took steps to ensure that Himachalis were not deprived of their lands by rich and exploitative outside elements; he brought in the Tenancy and Land Reforms Act in 1974, Section 118 of which imposes severe restrictions on non- Himachalis buying land  in the state. They can do so only after obtaining prior approval of the government. Subsequent Chief Ministers, sadly, have lacked the same foresight and have introduced so many exemptions and loopholes in the law that now any smart lawyer or purchaser can buy any extent of land in the state for any purpose. And this is happening on a colossal scale, as the Shimla- Narkanda figure in para one proves. In just the last three years 1494 approvals have been granted, but this is only the proverbial tip of the ice-berg, the real mass of the problem lies below.

The actual transfer of lands to, and purchase by, outsiders would be many times the number of approvals officially cited above. This is because of the many exemptions provided to the operation of Section 118: no approval is required for a society consisting of agriculturists, flats built in urban areas, houses/flats taken on lease, RERA approved builder developments. These exemptions are actually loopholes and have virtually thrown up the whole of Himachal to land sharks and builders. In addition, "benami" land transfers are another way of avoiding the rigours of the law.                                                                                                 As living conditions in north Indian cities and metros steadily worsen, more and more people there are now investing in second homes in places like Uttarakhand and Himachal, especially post Covid. The threat now is to rural Himachal and its original residents. Land prices have sky-rocketed, and the Himachali landowner, unable to resist the lure of quick money, is being dispossessed of his ancestral lands on an ever increasing scale by hotels, home-stays, builder developments, resorts. This is changing the very architecture of the mountains, replacing green cover with concrete, effecting the demographics (as in the "ghost" villages of Uttarakhand), distorting local cultures. At risk is not only the geology but the very identity of the state.

                    

         [Flats for sale in Barog. Recreating the hills in concrete.

         Photo Credit: The Tribune]

The state's policy makers must look at the long term implications of such land transfers; it is time to review Section 118 of the HP Tenancy and Land Reforms Act to make it more restrictive. No approval should be given under this section for construction of hotels and  resorts in rural areas- they are ruining the hinterlands (just as they have the cities), one has only to visit the Tirthan valley, the Jalori pass to Jibhi stretch, the once pristine Barog saddle, the Mashobra-Naldehra section to see for oneself how pastoral Himachal is being converted into a concrete mess of multi storeyed structures There should be a complete ban on Section 118 approvals for real estate developments, housing societies, multi storey apartment blocks or villas. All the existing exemptions/loopholes in the Act need to be reviewed, especially the ones pertaining to RERA projects, purchase of flats, and leases. Some new curbs need to be introduced in the law, for example, a ban on purchase of lands belonging to Scheduled Castes, Scheduled Tribes and BPL families (as in Uttarakhand) to prevent their exploitation by deep pocket outsiders and land sharks. Except for specific projects approved by the government, non-Himachalis who wish to purchase land in the state should be required to establish some connection to the state, whether by way of service, business or family for a minimum number of years, to qualify.

There would, of course, be legal considerations involved in adopting this course of action. There is bound to be resistance from some panchayats as land values will drop, from politicians egged on by land dealers and real estate companies, from the builder and property dealer lobbies, from influential people in the metros looking for a piece of the mountains as their own premium condos are engulfed by pollution and civic  collapse. Fortunately, the HP High Court at least has grasped the gravity of the matter; in a recent order it has castigated the government for allowing the concretisation and denudation of the green cover of Barog. It has sought details of approvals accorded under Sec.118, sanction of building plans, number of trees felled on private land, and has even warned that it would not hesitate to order an investigation by the CBI.                  Anyone who loves Himachal and its peoples will welcome this order, and would hope that this is the first of many to follow. The government should stop playing politics and making money, and should realise that this is a matter of survival of the mountains and the people to whom they belong. The state cannot be allowed to become one huge resort or gated community.

ROLL OVER, BEETHOVEN ! (and RSS)

 All the signs of the Second Coming, as foretold in the Bible, are visible: wars and conflicts, natural disasters, lawlessness and moral decay of society. Increasingly, however, it would appear that the event shall happen, not in Bethlehem or Palestine, but in India. A new God is about to be born here. The omens and clues have been there for some time: the presiding over the "sengol" in a new Parliament, the displacing of the Shankaracharyas at the inauguration of the new Ram Mandir in Ayodhya, the Shivji type of meditative posture in a Kedarnath cave, the non-biological claims, the direct communion with the Gods. And if anyone still had any doubts, the recent birthday celebrations of the prime candidate for the job should dispel them like tear gas at Jantar Mantar. He was worshipped like a God incarnate by the faithful, the powerful, the 37% of the country who have been ideologically lobotomised, "diyas" lit for his long life, "bhajans" sung in his praise, I believe even temples erected for his eternal exaltation and glorification.

It appears to me that the stage is set for a new religion,Moditva, to replace Hindutva. The latter has served its purpose: religions must evolve to suit the zeitgeist of the times, new Gods must be brought in as lateral entry to strengthen the divine cadre, the scriptures must be reinterpreted to conform to the new ruling and fashionable ideology of the head priests, the loaves of office will be the new "prasad" on offer, the hosannas will now be digitized through EVMs. These are tectonic shifts in the religious firmament, the old deities can no longer meet the new job description, their CVs are dated. A new God, a new religion are needed. Mr. Modi and Moditva will fit the bill nicely, thank you.

Expect the proselytization in favour of Moditva to begin in earnest now, notwithstanding the many anti-conversion laws that bedevil other religions.. Actually, this job is already half done with Universities and colleges, "autonomous" institutions, the civil services and the top brass of the defense forces, Bollywood, the media, RWAs, already brought into the fold; the judiciary needs a few more strategically prodded Collegium postings to be fully baptised. The rest shall be done by Apostle Gyanesh Kumar.

There may, however, be a problem with this Roll Over, RSS ! moment. Will this hoary organisation, founded on the old Hindutva ethos, simply play ball and turn belly up? Or will it see Mr. Modi's Second Coming as its own Final Going ? And is the new Godhood even possible without the RSS singing hymns and psalms to it ? These questions shall be answered, methinks, not at Phillipi , but in Uttar Pradesh next year. Till then, dear reader, join a choir and start practicing. There is much singing to be done yet.

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The SIR (Special Intensive Revision) started as a catastrophe in Bihar and Bengal but has now become a farce in Delhi. India is perhaps the only country in the world (outside the totalitarian ambit) where even retired judges, an ex-Vice President, a serving Election Commissioner, Chief Ministers of states, a retired Army Chief, retired Ambassadors, a former Deputy Prime Minister, the Chief of its premier federal investigative agency-all pillars of the nation- have to prove their voter status and citizenship. Even though they have all voted in the past and have adorned the highest posts in the land! They are in the company of 4 million other Delhi voters, almost 40% of the existing voter list. Who says we are one of the world's leading unequal nations ? With his indiscriminate carpet bombing of voters Mr. Gyanesh Kumar has not only struck a blow for equity, but has also reduced our population by 130 million, as Mr. SY Quraishi has pointed out. Expect the Ministry of (Fudged) Statistics to rework our GDP and per Capita Income as an offering to the new deity.

There are, of course, many explanations for this farce. AI experts are of the view that this was bound to happen - with the Election Commission itself having gone rogue, it was inevitable that the AI agents in its algorithms too would turn rogue. Others believe that this was a false flag operation, the result of our close ties with Israel-by deliberately targeting the creme-de-creme of past and present governments, the ECI is debunking the charge that the exercise is meant to delete minorities and vulnerable sections who do not vote for the BJP. Can anything be more democratic, transparent and equitable ? A third explanation is that this is a shot across the bows for some- behave your self, or out you go from the voter roll and into Bangladesh !!  Our village idiot offered a fourth perspective- that this was Mr. Gyanesh Kumar's first move to, well, move into Rashtrapati Bhavan- a message that he holds all the cards, or votes, and that a  mere thirty pieces of silver will not do for him. But I prefer the prognostication of our hamlet's second eminence, the village drunkard who's steeped to his eyeballs with both booze and the latest news- viz. that Gyanesh Kumar, in the light of the latest developments, will be the first sacrificial offering to the new presiding deity of Moditva. He doesn't know it yet, but the cockroaches do, and they've been around for a long time, haven't they?

Which is the correct explanation? I don't know, and I really don't care. All I know is that a farce is no laughing matter. As Samuel Taylor Coleridge said: Farce is nearer tragedy in its essence than comedy is.

  

LESSONS FROM NEPAL FOR HIMACHAL- STOP THE DESECRATION OF THE DEV BHOOMI

 Only a fool  learns from  his own mistakes, said Otto von Bismarck, the wise man  learns from the mistakes of others. It is now time for policy makers in Himachal , who so far have refused to learn from either their own mistakes or that of Uttarakhand and Wayanad, to imbibe some lessons from the horrendous tragedy of Nepal. And the lesson is simple- the Himalayas have had enough. Back off!

"Development" has gone berserk in Himachal- 12000 hectares of precious forest land diverted in the last twenty years for various projects, 174 hydel projects sanctioned/ commissioned, 5 million trees felled, construction rules relaxed to permit even 10 storey buildings, the Shimla Development Plan 41 approved to deregulate the city's precious Green Belts and allow construction even in the Heritage and Core areas, an epidemic of unnecessary four-lane highways criss-crossing the state, scores of tunnels planned under the fragile mountains, plans to increase tourist footfall from the present 20 million/ annum to an unsustainable 50 million. And all this in a state which comes under the seismic category VI- the highest. No amount of warnings or reports from environmentalists and scientists that the mountains simply cannot sustain this level of anthropogenic activities have made the governments (current and past) see sense.

The Himalayas are now pushing back, with increasing intensity. Not-so-"natural" disasters in just the three years between 2022 and 2024 have caused direct financial losses of Rs. 13500 crores to the state and claimed 800 lives; the indirect losses to business and livelihoods are much more. (Just this year the losses so far have been Rs.1400 crores and more than 200 dead).For the natural features that held the fragile mountain stratas together- trees, glaciers, snowfields, river drainage- are being decimated and destroyed by these activities. The Himalayas are warming at twice the average global rate, and this warming effect is being amplified by local "heat islands" caused by emissions from heavy machinery and labour camps, deposit of black carbon on the ice fields, pollutants from the ever increasing number of vehicles intruding into high altitude fragile eco-systems on the new roads, removal of green cover. The permafrost which holds together the fractured mountain soil is melting. Dumping of muck in the watercourses is reducing their capacity to carry the excess water, resulting in regular "flash floods." Many  red lines have been crossed.

The Himalayas have been warning us for some time now- there was Kedarnath in 2013 , Chamoli in 2021, Sikkim in 2023, Dharali in 2025, and now Nepal.      Among the most dangerous impending threats to Himachal is the growing number and size of the glacial lakes in the state, primarily responsible for the disasters above. The state had 107 glacial lakes of noticeable size with a total area of 5.54 sq.kms in 1990, the numbers are  669 and 11.20 now. Some have reached dangerous proportions, like Ghepan in Lahaul which has grown six times to almost 100 hectares. All the major rivers emanate from the glaciers above these lakes and the hydel projects on these rivers are extremely vulnerable to GLOFs. The very hydrology of these rivers are changing. Any damage to these projects would also endanger the lakhs of people living in towns and villages below them, as Nepal has so tragically shown.

Himachal is also naturally susceptible to other high risks: the state lies in the highest seismic zone- VI, it has 20000 landslide prone hot-spots, EWEs (Extreme Weather Events) caused by climate change have increased by 40% in the last few years.

The time for studies, seminars and only monitoring is over. What is needed urgently is decisive action and a drastic change in the model of development the state has been following all these years. The government needs to consider these measures urgently:

* Impose a moratorium on ALL new hydel projects, and stay those sanctioned but not yet started actual construction. Scrap the dozens of projects approved/planned for the high altitude Chenab and Chandrabhaga basin in Lahaul-Spiti, and in Kinnaur and Pangi areas (which the local people have already been protesting against for many years).

* Exhume the 2010 report on environmental impacts of hydel projects by the then Addl. Chief Secretary (Forests) which the High Court had accepted but the then govt. had opposed and subsequent ones moth-balled. Consider its major recommendations- ban on hydel projects in high-altitude, alpine, glaciated, forest catchment areas; maintain minimum distance of 5kms between projects; ensure minimum perennial flow of rivers; develop EIAs, EMPs, CAT plans for the entire river basin (and not just individual projects), before sanctioning any project on any river. Review all projects in the light of these recommendations, and if they are not conforming to them, or pose a threat, then decommission them.

* Vigorously oppose the Center's proposal for a 8.7 km tunnel below the Pir Panjal range to bring the waters of the Chandrabhaga in Lahaul to the Beas in Kullu. This project would rip out the heart of the Himachal Himalayas and would be a disaster of unprecedented proportions: it would destabilise the geology of three districts, generate tens of millions of tonnes of muck which can only clog the rivers, waterways and drainage of these areas, it would disturb the underground acquifers and affect hundreds of water supply schemes, the additional water now added to the Beas would amplify the river's destructive potential, which already causes havoc in Kullu every year. New Delhi's diplomatic failures (which is the cause for this project) should not morph into misery for the state.

* Reconsider the mindless focus on increasing tourist numbers to 50 million from the current 20 million. The state's environment cannot support such numbers, the infrastructure needed for it- roads, buildings, vehicular pollution, sewage and garbage, water supply- would result in huge damage to the natural environment and cultural identity of the state. Learn from the Bhutan model, limit the numbers, improve the quality.

* Impose a ban on tourist/real estate/commercial constructions in rural areas, especially on the peripheries of major towns. Himachal's cities have been ruined by such constructions, mainly by outsiders who are now despoiling the rural areas, cutting hills, felling trees, congesting rural roads, straining local water availability, polluting the forests and water-sources with sewage and garbage, creating noise and light pollution The areas adjoining Kasauli, Solan, Shimla, Manali, Palampur, Dharamsala bear abundant testimony to this ravaging of the environment. Himachal's rural areas should not be allowed to go the way of its towns.

* Immediately discontinue and put a halt to the four-laning epidemic, which benefits only politicians, contractors and bureaucrats.  They are not needed, they fracture the geology of the areas they pass through, destabilise the slopes, destroy properties, deprive people of livelihoods, encourage even more polluting vehicles to contaminate our pristine ambience. Both the Parwanoo-Shimla and Kiratpur-Manali highways are continuing (and very expensive) disasters that prove this. Both remain "under construction" even after a decade.

The time to act is NOW. The Himalayas have tolerated our arrogance for centuries, but their patience is now wearing thin. The warnings to us are getting more frequent, and more intense each year. We proudly call Himachal the Dev Bhoomi but ravage and pillage it shamelessly for votes and profit. This must change. Even the Supreme Court warned the state govt. some months back to be more sensitive to the environment or the state would "disappear from the map " of India. We are proving right the words of Hubert Reeves, a French astrophysicist and environmentalist:

Man is the most insane species. He worships an invisible God and destroys a visible nature. Unaware that this Nature he is destroying is the God he is worshipping! 

Respect Nature. That is the true worship of God.

THE LAST SKY- COUNTDOWN FOR AN ENDANGERED PLANET

 

I'm happy to convey that my latest, eighth, book has been released yesterday by Authors Upfront/ Paranjoy. It is a book I always wanted to do, and am glad that my publishers have made it possible.

The Earth is hurtling towards environmental Apocalypse at break-neck speed, and every possible alarm is sounding. CO2e emissions are going up every year instead of declining, the planet is about to breach the critical 2* Celsius (increase in temperature) mark by 3035, 10 million hectares of forests are cut down every year and one third of the Amazon rain forests have vanished, all Himalayan glaciers will disappear by 2100, 10000 species of life forms are going extinct every year (1000 times the normal pace of nature).

 The state of India’s natural environment does not offer much hope, either. The present government’s stated policy of prioritizing “ease of doing business” over protecting the environment has led to dismantling and diluting the laws on the subject, converting the Ministry of Environment to a facilitator for industry and big capital (between 2014 and 2019 it approved 11500 cases of diversion of forest lands-99% of cases received!). Even the judicial guard-rails—the Supreme Court and the National Green Tribunal –appear to have fallen in line, as the recent judgments on the Aravallis and the Great Nicobar Project demonstrate unambiguously. More effort is spent by the government on fudging figures than on taking pro-active steps to move to a more sustainable policy.                                                                                                                                                 I will not bore the reader with more figures, the pieces in this book contain plenty of them. Suffice it to say that the present Holocene era has been  rechristened by scientists as the Anthropocene in recognition of the human-induced impact on the planet, and it may very well be the last for homo sapiens.

For things are only getting worse, for the three most powerful forces at play today which have the power to destroy the world- AI (Artificial Intelligence), Climate Change, wars -are coming together, developing a synergy which is ominous for the survival of all living creatures. The race for ever-increasing GDP numbers, unsustainable consumption and materialism, growing human populations, human avarice, greed and vision-less leadership-all mean that the planet’s natural resources are being plundered at a rate beyond its powers to replenish, and will lead to an inevitable collapse of the global eco-systems. Mankind cannot possibly survive this collapse.

Sadly, there is little interest in our country in this subject, even as the effects of ignoring it are compounding every year, whether it be urban pollution levels, increasing toxicity of rivers, falling ground water levels, melting of glaciers, emergence of zoonotic viruses, greater incidence of floods, landslides and GLOFS ( Glacial Lake Outburst Floods), changing weather patterns, heat-waves. No one appears interested in talking about this looming disaster- not the governments, media, political parties, judiciary, the dormant intelligentsia. It is never made an election issue or a public cause, except in some very instances, and then too it is quickly forgotten.

This book is an attempt to redress this (im)balance. The collection of 60 essays covers the period from 2014 to 2026, so that the reader can judge for himself the evolution of policies, impacts and urgency over time. (He will, unfortunately, find that things are only getting worse with each passing year). The essays address a wide canvas of issues: hydel projects, unplanned urbanisation, forest management, wildlife protection, rewilding, overtourism, excessive “development” in the Himalayan/ mountain states, short-sighted global and domestic policies, climate change. A whole chapter has been devoted to  Himachal Pradesh, for two reasons: first, I have served there for 35 years and am settled there and it is the state I know best. Secondly, Himachal accurately reflects the issues confronting all Himalayan states in the country.

The book has been divided into six chapters, the pieces in each covering a broad sector/ subject such as Policy Issues, Tourism, Hydel Projects, etc. The essays are arranged chronologically within each chapter, and dated, to provide the proper context for a better understanding by the reader. The purpose is not only to share information but to facilitate and encourage the reader to engage with the protection of our precious natural environment and ecology. Not just as an intellectual or academic exercise, but for a very selfish objective- to leave behind for our children a healthy, living and breathing planet. For, as someone said, this is the only planet we have, if we destroy it there’s no Plan(et) B.

(This book is available on Amazon (paperback and Kindle version) and at leading bookstores).

 

THOUGHTS ON EATING OUT , PROTESTS AND SPLIT PERSONALITIES .

 One doesn't eat out often, partly because I haven't yet received my last six DA instalments, but mainly because I can never find parking in NOIDA. But once in a while one has to be adventurous, so Neerja and I decided to have a night out. The question, however, prompted by recent FDA revelations about what is actually dished out as food in restaurants, was: how do we ensure that we are not served plastic granules as rice, palm oil as paneer, crow meat as chicken, shampoo and emulsifier as milk ? "I know," said Neerja, "let's invite Tukaram Mundhe to accompany us for dinner too!" She was right, you know-Mr. Mundhe is the new toast of the foodies, when he walks into a restaurant the rats and cockroaches (the real ones) leave by the back door, the analogue paneer is dumped into the sewer line, and managers start counting the flies in their kitchens instead of their profits.                                                                          I'm told the most sought after rating in Bombay eatery circuits these days is not the Michelin Star, but a certificate which proudly states "Tukaram Mundhe approved eatery." A close second is a board announcing: "Tukaram Mundhe eats here." But I'm afraid he may be Khemka-ed very soon: institutions nowadays are not expected to follow the law but to find ways around them, for a consideration, of course. Opposition to him has started organising itself. The Bombay High Court has already conveyed its royal displeasure to him. A report in a newspaper revealed that footfalls in restaurants have fallen by 20%, as folks no longer want to pay through their noses for dining on cockroaches, rats, flies and worms (not to mention the Service Charge). I would not be surprised if corporate hospital boardrooms are worrying about the declining patient numbers (and profits) in their Emergency wards for food poisoning, vomiting, loose motions, nausea and other complimentary gifts of five star eateries. Very soon this shall have an effect on our GST collections and the GDP, and Mundhe shall be declared a Dimagi Naxal and Pakistani collaborator. He will then be sent on deputation to the External Affairs Ministry where any damage he does will be as nothing compared to the destruction Messers Jaishankar and Misry have already wrought, and will therefore not be noticed. 

Coming back to my dinner date, Mr. Mundhe was not available on the phone: he was on his seventh interview of the day for a TV channel, after which he was scheduled to raid the Raj Bhavan kitchen. So Neerja and I decided to play it safe and have aloo parathas and kheer at Murthal- a dhaba is still the safest place to eat in India, and there's plenty of parking too. It also eases the pain of the missing DA instalments.

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The cockroaches, Dimagi Naxals and "kuttas" are barking up the wrong tree. The changes and reforms they want -in the examination systems, condition of schools, accountability- will not happen unless this unresponsive government in Delhi departs. And it will never depart as long as the future elections (general and state) are based on SIR and EVMs. It now appears increasingly plausible  that both have been so structured as to deliver victories for the BJP/NDA  when and where it matters. The anecdotal evidence is mounting. The established political parties appear to be  finally realising this, and the new kids on the block should, too. They will achieve their ultimate goal only when the elections are rendered fair and transparent, when the Election Commission of India is compelled to cancel SIR,  revert to the paper ballot system, impartially enforce the Model Code of Conduct; when the force of public pressure persuades the Supreme Court to quash the appointments of the three Election Commissioners as violative of an earlier SC judgment. These are the foundational changes the times demand and the CJP should take up - achieve these, and the rest will follow as surely as spring follows winter. Fail here, and the winter of discontent will continue for a very, very, long time and there will be no spring.

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I've reached the time of life when I can expect Drs. Dementia, Parkinson and Alzheimer to be standing in a queue outside my door. They have not, however, paid me a visit so far; I suspect because either my name has been deleted from their lists in a Gyanesh Kumar type of exercise, or because they suspect that I am already so far gone that their ministrations are not required. Which suits me fine, because these days I am afflicted by another condition- schizophrenia or split personality, or, to be more precise, splintered personalities because there are now so many of me. Let me explain.

The symptoms first evinced themselves in 2014 but have now metastatized to an impressive scale, especially after the July student protests in Delhi. I have always considered myself a dissident or dissenter of the Modi government and was fairly comfortable with this personality trait, notwithstanding that it has cost me most of my relatives and friends. But not any more. For I am now informed, on the authority of a dozen Ministers and Kangana Runout, that I am also a cockroach, a "kutta", an Andolanjeevi, gang member of both the Khan Market and Tukre-Tukre gangs, a gutter generation type, an anti-national, an urban Naxal, a Dimagi Naxal. Whew! That's a lot for any one individual to handle: I cannot for the life of me figure out to which of the above genera I belong. It has caused an identity crisis for me: who the Hell am I ? I probably need to see a shrink, but I don't think my CGHS card will cover that. Neerja, the only other intelligent member of my family other than Brutus, my doggo, says there is only one solution to my problem- stop disagreeing with Mr. Modi on everything and become his supporter. With this change my splintered personality will coalesce into just one - that of a Bhakt- and the schizophrenia will vanish in an instant. A Bhakt has no nuances, doubts, questions, he is self confident in his stupidity, proud of his incompleteness. I considered the idea for a couple of days but then decided to dump it. For I discovered that the "bhakt" has his own medical, much severer mental condition- Delusional Psychosis, in which he regards the non-biological one as a God, has a complete disconnect from reality, is ready to kill those who think, pray, eat or speak differently and is stone deaf to reason. I can live with my splintered personality but this "bhakti" is a pain in the traditional place I can do without. Maybe I'll just go to Sadhguru to find out the real me.

THE RETURN OF THE INDIAN JOINT FAMILY

 The joint family was one of the better constituents and binding blocks of Indian society for centuries. Consisting of three or four generations living under one roof, it bonded its constituent families into one larger whole, sustained positive relationships, pooled individual resources into one economic whole. Socially speaking, perhaps its best characteristic was that it took care of the weaker members of the larger family- the infants, the old, the sick or otherwise disabled, the unemployed, the indigent-and ensured that they too were cared for and lived a dignified life. The importance of this last aspect cannot be overstated, for then there were no government welfare schemes, pensions, hospices or Ayushman Bharat types of protective umbrella

Looking back, I feel that my father's generation was perhaps the last joint family generation (he passed on in 2017 at the age of 93). He himself grew up in a sprawling family consisting of his parents, four siblings, innumerable uncles, aunts and THEIR families, and a couple of near invisible widows. They all lived together in happy chaos in a huge "haveli" my grandfather had built in his village in Fatehpur district of UP; God only knows how the family's finances were managed: even a firm of chartered accounts would find it difficult to untangle the various contributions to the family kitty! One word of caution, however: don't for a moment think that it was run on democratic lines- no, sir, it was a patriarchical autocracy, my grandfather's word was the law and everyone accepted it because it was a mutually beneficial autocracy. No other system would have worked half as well !

The Indian joint family started fraying, I suspect, in the 60's and 70's, and it was more or less dead by the late 1990's and early 2000's. I'm sure sociologists have identified the reasons for its gradual demise, but it was an inevitable consequence of "development" as we know it.

Things started changing with my generation, the Baby Boomers. Education, mobility, job opportunities all expanded, youngsters started leaving their homes, first for better education and then for jobs, and settled down independently in places distant from their parental houses. This trend only expanded with the next generation, the Millenials. Joint families almost disappeared and were replaced by the "nuclear" ones. Loneliness for abandoned parents became a collateral damage.

I guess this social evolution was inevitable, not only for the reasons given above, but also as a consequence of improvement in girls' education. With this, they were no longer content to let early marriage define their lives: they now sought independent careers, and their own homes after marriage. How and where couples lived was now decided, not by a patriarch, but by economics- jobs, salaries, future career prospects, and the desire to raise their own families in their own way, without any parental interference.

But the wheel is coming full circle with Gen Z, and ironically, the same forces that drove them away from the joint family system are now forcing them back to it ! More and more young adults in their late twenties and early thirties, employed and unemployed, married or single, are now coming back to live with their parents. This is confirmed both statistically and anecdotally. Research shows that 70% -80% of young adults live with their parents, as do 20% of young couples, and the trend is only growing. In my own social and family circles I find that this is true in at least one out of every two families (including my own!). This shift has not happened  because of any change of heart on their part but because of pure economic and aspirational reasons.

The reasons are varied, both economic and social. Both boys and girls are marrying later: the mean marriage age for girls has gone up to 22.9 years ( 24 to 27.5 for girls in urban areas), and for boys to 29 years ( early 30's for urban based males). Being unmarried means they continue to live with their parents. Conversely, divorce rates are going up too- since 1990, it has gone up from 1.1% of all marriages to 1.6%, low by western standards, but an increase of 50% nonetheless. Divorce means the separated entities again return to the safe harbour of their parents (especially if there are kids involved)! 

Joblessness is another reason- 40% of India's graduates are unemployed, and a large cohort of those employed are barely able to subsist on the wages they get, especially in urban areas. A new NITI AAYOG report states that 8.70 crore youth (between the ages of 18 and 29) are in the NEET (Not in Employment, Education or Training) category. They have no choice but to live with their parents. Artificial Intelligence is beginning to exert its malevolent effect: big tech companies have already cut tens of thousands of jobs and more will be on the chopping block. Real estate, whether owned or rented, has become so prohibitively expensive in even Tier 2 or 3 cities that living separately is just a dream for most youngsters. The costs of domestic house-hold support, or for child rearing are unaffordable. At these prices, even aging parents and their cluttered houses start looking very attractive, and their expertise in bringing up kids is simply irreplacable! So the joint family is suddenly back in business.

And guess what?- it suits us aging Baby Boomers too. The empty nest is full again, the creeping loneliness is banished, life acquires meaning again. It's a win-win situation: for the youngsters it provides a material safety net, for the parents it fills an emotional vacuum. But there's a catch, as there usually is in all good things!

Nature did not intend for progeny to live with their progenitors for all time. This is why adolescent animals are banished by their parents once they are taught the skills of survival and are forced to fend for themselves. Joint families are a departure from this basic law of life. Too many adults living together generates tensions, arising from a dozen differing perceptions of personal space, views and opinions, social preferences, eating habits, financial matters, etc. The joint families of my father's era resolved these tensions by having one dominant authority- the head of the family- whose word was final and instinctively respected by all.

That is no longer the case with Gen Z, Alpha and whatever other alphabetical generations are biding their turn in the womb of time. Youngsters of today are taught to question, not accept things at face value, speak their minds, not acquiesce to authority blindly. This is anathema for joint families, and I see it playing out in many families. It will need a lot of patience, understanding, give-and-take, genuine care and respect for each other for Phase 2 of the joint family system to succeed. It is still a work in progress and I really don't know how it will work out. I hope it does because families are the bedrock of any society and happy, functional families make for a stable social order, something this increasingly fractured world badly needs.  

 

BOOK REVIEW- TETE-A-TEA by INDI KHANNA

 

READING  THE  TEA  LEAVES.

For most of us tea is the cuppa that wakes us up in the morning, for the cognoscenti it is a career, but for those who are passionate about it, it is a way of life. Indi Khanna, who will be a planter till the day he himself is planted on some hillside, belongs to this last category; combine this with an amazing zest for life, the irreverence of his Punjabi blood, the memory of a pachyderm, the story telling skills of a born raconteur, and what you get is this exhilarating book. This is not a book that tells you how to grow tea, or the difference between a first flush and a poker flush. What it does tell you, however, in 39 delightful chapters and the frequent four letter word, is about the hard working, hard playing life of a tea planter in India, starting with the "muster" before sun break and ending with that last drink at the planters' club (or in a swamp as the chapter A Slight Mishap honestly reveals!) post midnight.

Tea as a commercial crop was introduced in the Assam valley by the British in the 1830s and had expanded to the Nilgiris in the South by the 1850s. It is today one of India's biggest industries: the country is the world's second largest producer, churning out 1.38 billion kgs every year from 619000 hectares of plantations, valued at US$ 12 billion. But it is more than just an industry or product. Tea is the stuff of legends, it has created an entire sub-culture and way of life, and those who work on its plantations are a breed apart, not unlike the pioneer homesteaders of the American Wild West! The USP of this book is that it introduces us to this genre of homo sapiens as few others do.

Tea planters, of necessity, had to be self sufficient till very recently, in the era before four-lane highways, televisions, cell phones, OLEX or Blinkit, internet, FAX or mobile banking, which is the period the author recounts in this book. They had to be innovative, creative, adventurous, prepared for surprises, and the "jugad" was part of their SOP. The forty odd stories in this book explain this in greater and side-splitting detail. A few need to be mentioned to give the reader a flavour of what Indi Khanna has cooked up!

Nothing Was Ever Im-'piss'-able informs us that an important part of an Asstt. Manager's job was to faithfully record (in a rain measure) every morning the precipitation in the past 24 hours since it had a bearing on productivity and future planning. Indi was perplexed by the fact that, of his 13 fields, one consistently recorded much higher rainfall than the other 12. Looking at it from every angle failed to deliver any reason or answer for this mystery. So he decided to pitch his tent one night next to the rain gauge to witness for himself any unusual phenomenon that could explain this. He was roused from his sleep well past midnight by lusty singing and swearing sounds; he saw the night watchman, thoroughly sozzled, totter and weave his way to the rain gauge and empty his full bladder (with remarkable accuracy) into the said receptacle, and wander off! He apparently did this every night, being a man of regular habits. Indie had solved the mystery, though he does not tell us what exact explanation he gave his boss.

My favourite story in the book has the same thread- or is it 'stream'-of piss running through it. Appropriately titled Pissing Golf, it details how native jugad modified the original game of golf invented in St. Andrews. In the planters' club, one didn't need to be good at golf to win a tournament, one needed to have a strong bladder and do the Kegel's exercise regularly. The rules of the tournament demanded that one have a very large, Patiala size drink (Bloody Mary or beer) before teeing off at each of  6 of the 9 holes (the others being 'dry' holes). No great shakes, you say? But wait for Rule 2: no one was allowed, on pain of penalties, to relieve himself behind a bush or elsewhere till he had holed out at the 9th hole! Try that, Tiger Woods! One presumes that those with prostate problems were not encouraged to take part in the tournament.

The other stories are equally hilarious and give us an honest glimpse of the lives of the planters, whether in Assam or the Nilgiris, places where the author served. They include accosting elephants and wild boars, catching trout in the mountain streams (always ensuring that the fish caught were never bigger than the boss's catch!), floating down the mighty Brahmaputra for days on an improvised "home" built on eight drums lashed together, bringing up kids with the sole assistance of a volume of Benjamin Spock, repaying Divali card debts, not in cash, but in bovine currency, living in a haunted 'chang' house (one on stilts) where the thunder-box was want to collapse if the incumbent didn't watch his weight!

Each story is a delightful gem, related with self deprecating humour- Indi Khanna churns them out, not with his tongue- in- cheek, but with the said appendage firmly stuck out, challenging you to protest or do better. Do not, however, presume that it was all fun and games for the planters and their families. Beneath the fun is the reality of an intrepid breed of men and women, fending for themselves in remote regions without the amenities we take for granted in today's urban communities. It was a hard life- living in isolated locations, cut off from the larger family and friends for eleven months in a year, having to send their children to hostels at the age of five or six, working round the clock 24X7, especially during the plucking and factory processing seasons, finding their own quick-fixes when things went wrong or broke, dealing with undisciplined and sometimes violent labour, a medical officer substituting for a vet and vice versa! But they took all this in their stride, supported by a close circle of friends and colleagues, an undaunted pioneering spirit, and, of course, that vital Planters' Club. In a way, they have created history. This book is a light-hearted record of how this history was made. Which is why it is a must-read for all those who partake of the cup that cheers, but does not inebriate. And don't take that last bit too literally, says Indi Khanna.

A BROKEN IMAGE, A SQUANDERED LEGACY.

The writing has been on the wall for quite some time, for all to see except perhaps the acolytes of the NDA government. India's falling governance parameters over the last decade ( Press Freedom, Rule of Law, Inequality, Human Rights, Religious Freedom, Environmental Performance, Academic Freedom) all indicate a gradual structural collapse of the institutions of government, and growing contempt for international covenants. A global pushback was inevitable, and the first sign of it came post 2021when bodies like V-DEM, EIU (Economist Intelligence Unit) and Freedom House downgraded India's democratic status to "Partly Free" ,"Electoral Autocracy" and "Flawed Democracy" . In 2025,  the country's NHRC (National Human Rights Commission) was downgraded to B category by GANHRI (Global Alliance of National Human Rights Institutions) for its perceived lack of independence and failure to address human rights violations. 

The USCIRF (United States Commission on International Religious Freedom) has demanded of its Congress that India be designated as a country of particular concern and a source of transnational oppression. It has also asked for sanctions to be imposed on Chief Ministers of UP, Uttarakhand and Assam, the RSS and Bajrang Dal-all for their persecution of minorities. It has demanded investigations against firms whose equipments have been used to target minorities and for opening hearings against on-line tech platforms for spreading hate and abuse against them.

Earlier this month Amnesty International has written to the Indian government accusing it of violating the Genocide Convention and the Geneva Convention, and of being complicit in Israel's genocide in Gaza,  by allowing the export of almost 800 shipments of Indian made  weapons, munitions and ordnance to Israel which has been held guilty of war crimes, genocide, ethnic cleansing and apartheid. It has identified at least seven Indian companies, including (astonishingly) public sector companies. By doing so we are exposing ourselves to moral and legal consequences internationally. 

But the biggest blow has been struck last month by the release of a damning report by the United Nations, no less, which virtually amounts to a show-cause notice. In a letter to GOI three rapporteurs of the United Nations dealing with religious freedom, human rights and minorities have expressed grave doubts about the manner in which SIR (Special Intensive Revision) has been/ is being carried out by the ECI (Election Commission of India) in Bihar, Bengal and in the rest of India. They have questioned the opacity, methodology, selective nature, need and purpose of this arbitrary exercise. The notice does not do so in a vacuum but quotes facts and figures from the government's own sources and what is available in the public domain. It expresses alarm at the massive exclusion of voters, especially of those in West Bengal and those from the minority communities. It tellingly notes that all these actions of the ECI/Government appears to be in violation of international covenants and resolutions of which India is a signatory. The rapporteurs have requested the government for comments/ clarifications in a time bound manner before they submit their final  report to the UN Human Rights Council.     As I write this, the government is yet to reply to the UN  but the MEA has issued a brief statement terming these charges as "baseless" and "unwarranted", and that the SIR exercise has the approval of the country's Supreme Court. In a reply to a question in Parliament on 30th July, a Minister more or less repeated this, adding that deletion of names of those who have demitted or migrated or changed residence is a regular exercise. This statement carries no conviction because it is the default template of the Ministry against any criticism of this thick skinned regime. Additionally, the Minister made no mention of the deletions in Bengal on account of the mysterious and opaque "logical discrepancy" clause, the 2.7 million who were not allowed to vote even though their appeals were pending,  the lack of transparency in the use of untested and secret algorithms used by the ECI, or the reasons for the disproportionate deletions of Muslims from the rolls.

The letters by the UN rapporteurs are not just an arraignment of the ECI but are also an indictment of our Supreme Court. The Court had innumerable opportunities to rein in the rampaging ECI but failed to do so. Instead of examining its legality, modus operandi, necessity, impact on citizenship, it nibbled at the edges of the issue for a year till the SIR became a fait accompli. It allowed the ECI to hold two elections on the basis of this patently defective exercise, and remained silent even when the Commission extended it to the rest of the country! It has now given its final seal of  approval to the SIR, paving the way for even more millions to be deleted from the voters' rolls. The Court has failed the citizens of the country, and this is implicit in the letter of the UN.

The UN letter is also a stricture against our NHRC, which is already in the dog-house as explained earlier, and our totally ineffective and vestigious Minority Commission. I can't remember the last time either of these institutions ever spoke up for the people in exercise of their mandates and in justification of the tens of crores of rupees spent on them. By their deafening silence on the SIR- the disenfranchisement of millions of voters, especially minorities, the dangerous uncertainties created over their citizenship, the subsequent denial of state welfare benefits to them by many states- both these Commissions have turned a blind eye to this unholy exercise and have betrayed their mandate.

The international opprobrium against India is mounting by the day and our government cannot keep stonewalling it indefinitely. We have forfeited our moral stature, the traditional championing of human rights and freedoms, our leadership of the global South , of SAARC and perhaps even BRICS by our highly questionable human rights record and the puzzling embrace of Israel, an international pariah. We continue to  provide ammunition to countries inimical to us (like Pakistan, which, significantly, is the President of the UN Human Rights Council), to initiate action against us, including sanctions, warrants from the ICC or ICJ. We have torpedoed any chances we had for a seat in the UN Security Council. We have isolated ourselves on all global matters of importance and have become a vassal of the USA and Israel. The BJP's religious bigotry and lust for power internally is proving too high a cost to bear globally. Surely, the India of Gandhi, Nehru, Tagore, Kabir and Vivekananda deserves better? 

JANTAR MANTAR AND THE OTHER SIDE OF MIDNIGHT

 Now that we have an idea of what Mr. Modi looks like at the stroke of the midnight hour, and have also learnt how to install a teleprompter on a mobile phone, let us move on to some other aspects of the Jantar Mantar protests not yet reported upon.                                               Nothing better exhibits, or symbolises, the decline of our republic and its leadership quality than a comparison of two of our Prime Ministers speaking at the midnight hour  to the nation. On August 14, 1947, Jawaharlal Nehru, India's first Prime Minister, delivered to the world his iconic and immortal speech about India's tryst with destiny, acknowledged to be among the finest words ever uttered by any statesman- a speech brimming over with pride, a sense of achievement, vision and hope for a new-born country. On the midnight of 23rd of July, 2026, our current Prime Minister, Mr. Modi, too delivered a short video speech via his mobile phone, not to celebrate his country's freedom but to dig himself out of a hole of his own making- a jaded address reeking of insincerity, dissimulation, empty promises . Whereas Nehru's words electrified a whole nation, Mr. Modi's words, deservedly, will be remembered only by his speech writers- with, one hopes, a lot of mortification. Hopefully we will not find them in our NCERT history books now that Mr. Pradhan is himself history, but one can never be sure.

Every joke, said George Orwell, is a  revolution. And oh,boy! was he right!                        For the CJP (Cockroach Janata Party) did begin life as a joke. The inadvertent raconteur  was none other than our own Chief Justice of India, the venerable and Honourable Surya Kant . For it was his wisecrack equating the youth to cockroaches (Hahaha) that brought the invincible cockroaches from out of the chinks and cracks of the country into which this government's policies had shoved them, and into the arena of politics and public protests, bringing to its knees one of the most formidable political parties and authoritarian governments in the world.  And the Hon' CJI did not rest for a moment on his laurels, or his funny bone- he further immortalised his constitutional credentials by initially refusing to entertain a mention in court by a lawyer to look into the use of excess force on protesters on the 20th July by the Delhi police (since denied). Notwithstanding the over-whelming visual evidence available in the public domain, he was reported to have said that he did not have the time to watch videos of the police violence. (Another joke- Hahaha!) This naturally enraged the youngsters to greater heights of determination, culminating in the government throwing in the blood-soaked towel on the 25th July.  Which is why I feel that Gen XYZ (I can never figure out which is the appropriate alphabet for the current Gen) has failed to give due credit to the Hon CJI for its historic success . But they can still make amends: our local village idiot has suggested that the  acronym CJP should now be read as the Chief Justice Party. That, according to him, would deservedly recognize Hon Surya Kant's contributions to the preservation of democracy and the idea of justice in India. Being an idiot of long standing, however, he is not aware that this may constitute contempt of court, and that that is one power the courts are still willing to exercise. Hence, the clown's suggestion has been rejected and he has been removed from his post. he went without any fuss and no lathi charge was needed to persuade him. The village drunkard suggested the moniker Cocktail Janata Party as it better reflects the mix of youthful spirits at Jantar Mantar; this found favour with most of us (except the Excise Inspector), and has been forwarded to Mr. Dipke.

Coming now to Mr. Pradhan's resignation letter. Now, in my career I have seen many resignation letters, including one which said: "Dear sir, I quit. Please accept my sympathies for your loss." In one instance the chappie came with a band and dancers to hand over his resignation letter: this oddity is normal in my Himachal, whether it is resignation, retirement or suspension! Here, they just need an excuse to uncork the "angoori", form a circle and start gyrating, clockwise for retirements and anti-clockwise for resignations. But Mr. Pradhan's resignation letter takes the (cow-dung) cake for its sheer effrontery.

It is not a resignation, it is a treatise, a CV and a character/commendation certificate all rolled into one. It is the farewell speech no one bothered to give him and reminds me of that doleful Jim Reeves song: "I missed me, how I missed me at your home last night..." Substitute "your home" with "my office" and the Minister could have made a musical video of it and earned lavish praise from Gen RDX and Shakira. As it is , no one could figure out whether it was a resignation or an application  for sainthood. As someone said, all he needed to write was: "Bro, I fu**ed up big time. Gotta go." It would have been the honest truth, with no scope for ambiguity. Never mind though, maybe the next Minister could use this when his or her time comes.

And finally, what can one (an unabashed admirer) say of Ms. Kangana Runout? Although situated in seismic zone VI, Himachal had no volcanoes till 2024. Then Ms. Runout exploded onto the scene, and since then she has erupted regularly, covering her own face and that of her party with ashes and soot. She is one natural disaster the NDF is not equipped to handle, and for which the Finance Commissions provide no compensation to the state. After her experience with the farmers' agitation , why on earth would she repeat it by vilifying and insulting the brave young girls at Jantar Mantar? My wife, Neerja, with the perspicacity that only women possess, has an explanation: Kangana is actually a Gandhian; having been slapped on one cheek by a Sikh lady police constable last year, she now wants to be slapped on the other one too, completing a virtuous circle as it were.  She'll probably get her wish soon- God never disappoints the devout or the Runout.                   

TIME TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT THIS LONGEVITY FAD

 It's not working. These days everybody and his grandfather wants to live to be a hundred, even if it's in a hospital ICU. And if we continue to make babies at the current rate and impose an 18% GST on condoms (28% for flavoured condoms as they come under the category of fruits), by 2050 we would have eaten every animal, bird, fish, reptile and insect on the planet, except perhaps cockroaches which are hard to digest (as Mr. Modi is finding out).  And by 2100 we would have started eating each other, which is actually not such a bad thing. For the plain fact is that this planet simply cannot support its current population of eight billion, expected to swell to twelve billion by 2100. A recent study published in Environmental Research Letters reveals that the planet's natural resources can sustain only 2.5 billion sapiens, homos included.

Take India- currently 1.4 billion, expected to grow to 1.7 billion by 2070, most of this growth coming from bhakts. Our government, of course, assures us that our fertility rate has dropped to 2.1, less than the replacement rate, and that soon the acchhe din will be here. I don't believe a word of it, for all figures released by this regime are fudged. And we keep finding innovative ways of reducing our population, on paper at least. For example, the recent SIR has cut the population by 70 million- people who don't exist because they are deleted from the voter rolls. The government refuses to acknowledge their existence. That should reduce our fertility rate to 1.8 or so, and by the time Mr. Gyanesh Kumar completes his unholy exercise it should be down to 1.5 ! So you see why the only figure I approve of is that of Sunny Leone: it's a sight for sore eyes, has been consistent for many years, and what you see is, as they say, what you (don't ) get.

So how do we avoid becoming homo cannabalis ? Economists like Messers Ruchir Sharma and Sanyal tell us that every problem has a supply side and a demand side to it. In this case we can do little on the supply side because the babies will keep coming, as long as India remains the third largest consumer of porn in the world. So the solution to this over- population has to be found on the Demand side, and I've just found one: put a cap on longevity. No one should be allowed to live beyond 75 years, this is not the era of Methuselahs. Pass a law that everyone shall be euthanised once he/she/it reaches the age of 75, it is not enough to put them in the Margdarshak Mandal.

Consider the benefits of this drastic final solution, not just for the planet but for ourselves personally. Death will become an appointment, not an accident, and the uncertainty shall be removed for ever. We all secretly wish to die in bed of an embolism or heart attack, blissfully unaware that we are dead till we find ourselves at the pearly gates, confronted by St. Peter asking us for our Aaadhar card or Voter IDs. But we also know that that is a remote possibility, and that we are more likely to quit this mortal coil because an eagle drops a tortoise on our heads (like Aeschylus, the Greek playwright), or on a toilet seat (like Elvis Presley), or in one of Mr. Gadkari's tolled pot- holes. I personally find this uncertainty very unsettling, I would like to know how and when I'm supposed to go so that I can prepare for it. My solution ticks these boxes nicely.

It gets better: your kids won't throw you out of the house because now they know they will not have to wait indefinitely ( like Prince Charles for his kingship), it will be theirs in any case in a few years. Governance will improve because now politicians, judges, bureaucrats won't be seeking re-election or re-employment- knowing that they have only a few years left, they would now much rather do those things they always wanted to but had kept postponing- that trip to Las Vegas or Sonagachi, a dinner at a Michelin star restaurant, organise a Satyanarayan pooja for Mr. Modi's good health, visit the Ram Mandir before it is given on perpetual lease to Mr. Adani, take the shocked wife on a second honeymoon because you missed the first one as you had to go on election duty, or make desperate love to that woman you always desired but had been waiting for an opportune moment which never came.

Since you will no longer be a drooling, doddering, incontinent octogenarian (you'll be terminated at 75 remember?) you don't have to worry about cancer, intestinal blockage, thrombosis, dementia or prostate enlargement, etc. You can die with dignity, dressed in a three piece suit, not in faded pyjamas or in a towel. You'll save a fortune in medical bills. Your kids and heirs will also save a fortune, this time on lawyers' bills, because, being forewarned about your exit date, you can set your finances, wills, nominations etc in order and obviate any scrapping among your heirs later. They will love you for it, and will dote on you right up till the moment the crematorium door slams down on you with the finality of a Supreme Court order.

The government would be ecstatic: its pension bills would decline dramatically, it will no longer have to wrack its brains to find suitable berths for redundant party workers or retired judges, it will save trillions because, with a declining population, there will now be no need to provide for measures against global warming, climate change, ever increasing old age pensions and Ayushman Bharat bills. The world as a whole will save sextillions of dollars more once Trump is euthanised under the new law because there will be no more wars and the Strait of Hormuz will be open again. Sadly, however, Putin and Netanyahu will still be around for a few more years.

This leaves only one more box to tick: how exactly will these millions of old codgers be dispatched? Well, Elon Musk has provided the answer- the neuralink brain implant. Designed to be implanted in the brain to control one's cognitive and sensory functions via a computer, all it will now need is to be equipped with a "kill switch". This will be automatically triggered once a person reaches 75, stopping all bodily and brain functions in a nano second.

There is also a Plan B, in case the kill switch fails, as it is likely to do in the case of bhakts who in any case do not have any brain function. These Neanderthals shall be locked up in an auditorium and shall have to watch, without any break, 100 episodes of Man Ki Baat and Ministry of External Affairs press conferences. Extensive trials have shown that no one can survive more than 25-30 such episodes, though the process is not entirely painless.

The new law should , however, have one caveat- it will have prospective effect only, and not apply retrospectively. This, of course, has nothing to do with the fact that both Mr. Modi and I turned 75 last year.

THE RULES OF THE GAME HAVE CHANGED - WILL THE GAME CHANGE TOO ?

 Any game, or contract, is based on and pre-supposes mutually accepted rules which govern, and bind, the participants. Democracy is one such contract, the ultimate social contract, in which the citizens (the ruled) give up their individual powers to the elected government (the ruler) in return for the protection of their rights, freedoms and the pursuit of happiness in their own individual ways. In India so far, for the last 75 years, this contract has held together though it has come under strain at many times. The credit for this goes to enlightened leadership and constitutional institutions that have usually worked, notwithstanding some blips and glitches.

But over the last decade or so the authoritarian, unilateral, anti-federal, non-accountable governance style of the NDA government has put this contract under immense strain, and on the 20th of July it has come to near breaking point. The impetus behind it is the Modi government's panaroia about any kind of protest or opposition to its policies and diktats- it views them as challenges, and not as opportunities to introspect and/or self-correct. This happened with the Assam NRC, CAA, Covid, Manipur, Article 370 and Kashmir, SIR, the Ken_Betwa protests. But on the 20th of July, this paranoia reached new heights (or lows) when the full might of the state was unleashed on young students, and blood was spilt on the streets of Delhi, all over a protest against India's rancid and corrupt examinations system.

By this unjustifed violence the government has broken the contract with its citizens. Sovereign violence is to be used against enemies of the state, and not against its own children. A government which cannot differentiate between the two has finally exposed its fascist, illiberal, intolerant and dictatorial nature, and the Jantar Mantar protests have shown it in all its ugly nakedness. Despite the prostitution of the darbari media and TV channels, the internet and Youtube have brought this to the doors of every Indian, and support for the students is only growing.

The unkindest cut of all (to the spirit of democracy)has been inflicted by none other than the Chief Justice of India himself, Justice Suryakant. Perhaps this should have been expected, for it was his earlier intemperate remark about cockroaches that has led to this spiral of events in the first place. Responding to a PIL by a lawyer asking for an inquiry into the police excesses of 20th July, the CJI peremptorily dismissed it with the observation that he did not have the time to watch videos (of the police violence on protesters). This was a remark  callous and unbecoming of a person appointed to protect the constitutional rights of citizens. He was not being petitioned to watch a Kangana Ranaut movie, but to view the documented evidence of unlawful violence on unarmed teenagers, to seek answers from the government on questions that screamed out for answers: Who were the "brownshirts", masked and in civvies, who were allowed to beat up students with lathis and total impunity with the police watching? How did a truck laden with stones find its way to the high security Jantar Mantar area and who brought it? Why were peacefully marching students beaten up brutally without any provocation? Why did the policemen take off their name badges? What is the identity of the jawan who is seen ramming his baton between a young girl's legs even as she is walking away? What is the name of the DCP who walks up to one young girl and slaps her in the face for no reason at all? Where is the footage of protesters throwing stones and beating up policemen, as alleged by the government? Were illegal lethal weapons such as pellet guns, taser (electrically charged) batons and nail studded lathis used against the students? Who are the goons, in plainclothes, seen throwing stones and wrecking cars? Was there a deliberate attempt to discredit the protesters and provoke violence?

The refusal of the CJI to entertain this petition and seek answers to the questions above has thrown an obfuscatory veil over the events of 20th July not dissimilar to the white sheet used to cover the abduction of Sonam Wangchuk from Jantar Mantar by the same police. In contrast, however, credit must be given to the justices of the Delhi High Court who, on 22nd July, have admitted a similar petition and have issued notice to the government and the Delhi police (though it demanded an urgent hearing and not a four week notice).

This is a moment of inflection for the entire non-NDA opposition. They have to live up to it, which at the moment they do not appear to be doing. They cannot plough their own individual furrows, headed for nowhere, but must come together to offer counsel and guidance to these gallant students who are full of passion and sincerity but lack the experience of conducting long-drawn out protests. At the moment there is no sign of such a concerted action on the part of these parties, each of whom is trying to take credit and control of this movement. The Congress wants the agitation to come under its umbrella, the AAP feels this right is theirs as the legal heirs of the Anna movement, the SP and UBT Shiv Sena seem to have some reservations, the TMC is supportive but distant, the DMK will not sup with the Congress, even Sonam Wangchuk has called off his fast today, a not unexpected development since he had  started blowing hot and cold of late (in my view he has probably struck a deal with the government about his personal future in Ladakh. In any case, he has now become irrelevant to the movement).

The entire Opposition should realise (as these youngsters have) that the rules of the game have changed. The government will not abide by its part of the contract: it will not conduct fair elections, it has suborned all agencies of governance, it has defenestrated all constitutional institutions, it has rendered the entire judiciary submissive, it has bought over the media, it has made the use of sovereign violence its greatest persuader, it refuses to be held accountable. With these rules the Opposition has become superfluous, it can never win an election or preserve even a semblance of democracy in the country. It can no longer wage a struggle in Parliament, or the Election Commission or the Supreme Court- these institutions have been hollowed out and can no longer serve the purpose for which they were created. It can no longer fight a fair electoral contest- the game now has to change to one of resistance in the public arena- in Jantar Mantar, Parade Grounds, Azad Maidan, Freedom Park, Ramlila Maidan, Swami Sivavananda Salai, Dharna Chowk, Gandhi Maidan. The students are already there, and doing a fine job; it is the responsibility of the main opposition parties to join them there. Credit can be apportioned or shared when the monster has been vanquished.

"There is a tide in the affairs of men, which, taken at the flood leads on to fortune..." Rahul Gandhi has no doubt read this quote from Shakespeare, he now needs to embrace it. The students at Jantar Mantar have created this tide, it is now for him to rally the other Opposition parties, national and regional, to seize the moment. The game has changed, and playing by the BJP's new rules will get them nowhere. The Empire has already begin to strike back, using its bottomless bag of tricks: another 20 companies of CRPF have reportedly been flown in to Delhi, the Police Commissioner has been given powers under NSA to detain people for 12 months without trial, it has been stated that passports of detained protesters will be cancelled, a petition has been filed in the Delhi High Court seeking an NIA investigation into the funding of the CJP (Cockroach Janata Party) protests. More can be expected: curbs on YouTube channels on their reporting, profiling of protesters and visits to their parents, debarring them from admissions or sitting for examinations. It is not possible to resist the resources of a modern state for very long. Very soon the tide will begin to turn, and then the opportunity will have been lost - for ever.

THE LONG, BUMPY ROAD TO SWADESHI JURISPRUDENCE

It was  indeed a wise man who said that judges should shun the spotlight and let their judgments do the talking. But that was before the era of the sound byte, Youtube and 24x7 breaking news. And, of course, reemployment after retirement or the need to demonstrate loyalty. In India's legal firmament today judgments do not make news, mainly ( I suspect) because they have become one sided and therefore predictable. It is the obiter dicta which makes news nowadays, delivered from the lofty perch of finality, if not infallibility.

Chief Justice of India the Hon' Suryakant is currently not only the master of the roster, he is also the master of the obiter dicta. How can we forget, if not treasure, his denunciation of the three distinguished academicians who wrote that chapter on the judiciary for an NCERT textbook,  banning them from any government engagement? The later cockroach comment is now part of legal folklore. And just last month, in an address at Oxford University, he remarked that India should develop its own "swadeshi jurisprudence", something even our freedom fighters had not thought of.

I am not sure what the Hon'ble judge meant by this call to a legal atmnirbharta, or whether this self-inflicted ghetto-isation is the right course to follow. For, in civilised democracies at least, jurisprudence and laws are aligned to global principles, concepts, conventions, declarations, rights and charters, and till recently we more or less conformed to these universal principles. Over the last decade or so, however, we have started ploughing our own legal furrow, and the remark of the CJI has only served to draw attention to this unhealthy development.

For, it must be lamented, swadeshi jurisprudence has (unfortunately) already arrived in India, which is why, according to the WJP (World Justice Project) Rule of Law ranking for 2025, we are at 86 out of 143 countries, firmly in the bottom half ; we have been consistently slipping down  this index - in 2014 we were at 66. Frankly, I am not surprised, because the evidence is strewn all over the road to a swadeshi jurisprudence, like road kill. It is the price we have paid for the gradual loss of independence, integrity and quality of the judiciary, and its eagerness to accommodate the executive.

Jurisprudence in India today appears to be governed by four made-in-India/ swadeshi doctrines which should be a blot on any justice system: the doctrines of the fait accompli, sealed cover, ignore the science, reward the criminal.                                      Important, even constitutional, challenges to the executive's actions are kept on the back- burner for so long (Article 370, CAA, SIR, Shiv Sena split) that by the time they are decided it is impossible to turn back the clock and undo what the govt. of the day has already implemented on the ground. The sealed cover has become the standard fall-back option for denying full disclosure to civil society petitioners, or for not giving rebuttable reasons for a particular judgment (Rafale, Pegasus, Vantara, Hindenberg). Increasingly, this spectre of our swadeshi jurisprudence, like the executive, shows disdain and contempt for science, as in the case of stray dogs, Aravalli mountains, the Char Dham highway, the Great Nicobar project: more trust is reposed on govt. appointed committees and patently partisan Ministries than on scientists, domain experts and specialised organisations working in the relevant field. Finally, this hybrid form of justice ensures also that the criminal will be duly allowed to keep the proceeds of his crime ( Ram Mandir, Electoral bonds) even as his actions themselves are declared irregular! A judicial paraprosdokian if ever there was one.

Perhaps the biggest stain on our swadeshi system of justice is the default denial of bail to 3 out of 4 accused who are otherwise entitled to bail under law: 74% ( 3.9 million) of the prison population are undertrials, and the position keeps getting worse as more and more draconian laws are being promulgated every day. Eminent scholars, academicians, students, social activists, journalists are denied bail for as long as five years, even though they are not convicted, and in many cases their trials have not even commenced. A university professor with 90% disability is deemed to be a national security threat, kept in jail for years without a trial, finally acquitted and released by a High Court, but pushed back in within 24 hours at an urgent hearing on a Saturday by the apex court! And here is the supreme irony- while those who are not convicted are kept in jail, the convicted are released on parole whenever they want a breath of fresh air!                                            Millions of voters are denied their voting rights by a capricious CEC and his untested algorithms, their appeals are kept pending, but the swadeshi response to their entreaties is a callous- Never mind, you can vote in the next elections! An exercise, based on mysterious algorithms , which has disenfranchised millions of citizens, has been given the highest court's imprimatur of approval. Thanks to this endorsement the citizenship, welfare benefits and very social identity of tens of millions more are now being denied. Judicial orders are flouted by the executive on a routine and continuing basis- on Aadhaar, demolitions, bulldozers, hate speech, voter rolls, citizenship, to mention just a few areas- but there is no pushback or punitive action by the courts. 

The swadeshi jurisprudence model has ensured that our judicial system is broken and on the point of total collapse. There is a backlog of 54 million cases which will take 323 years to clear; of these 180000 cases are pending for more than 30 years. India has only 15 judges per million population against a developed country average of 150-200 (China's figure is 300). It gets worse- the judiciary has carved out so many privileges for itself, it is accountable to no one: a Collegium system ensures that only judges can appoint judges, and that too in the opaquest of manners; judicial corruption cannot be investigated unless the judiciary itself permits it (!); even though all govt appointees are required to declare their assets, it is reported that only 12% of judges have done so; it has been reported that, historically, appointments to the Supreme Court are limited to just 250 families in the entire country. This is a swadeshi blueprint for judicial anarchy and ochlocracy, not jurisprudence

No, sir, the last thing we need is a swadeshi version of what a justice system should be. The swadeshi model ensures that democracy (and justice) has become a privilege available only to those with influence. Your constitutional rights depend on who you are. Leave swadeshi to the politicians, the jurisprudence of rights, justice and equity needs a more solid and time-tested foundation. We need to adopt best global practices and principles and dig ourselves out of this swadeshi hole. And yes-let judgments do the talking, not obiter dicta.

WHATEVER HAPPENED TO THE PRIME TIME NEWS ?

 I am a happy man these days, or at least as happy as anyone can be in this Ram rajya where even 1600 CTVs and 400 security guards could not prevent His abode from being looted by His own bhakts. To be clear, however: I am not happy because Mr. Pradhan has resigned as Education Minister (he has not), or because Mr. Modi has returned his AI generated award from Seychelles (he will not), or because Kangana Ranaut has taken a vow of silence for one year (she cannot)- all these are worthy objectives but the persona involved are genetically incapable of attaining them. So why am I in this happy frame of mind? I am happy, dear reader, because I can now again watch television at prime time, something I had given up doing because news is no longer worth a straw (more on that later). But now that we have a veritable banquet of sports laid out before us- Women's T20 World Cup, India's T20 tour of England, the FIFA world Cup, Wimbledon- my prime time is fully catered for, God's in his heaven, and Arnab Goswami, Navika Kumar and Padmaja Joshi et al  can go take a dump in the Ghazipur landfill or the Miti river, for all I care.

There was a time, about a decade ago, when news channels like NDTV, TIMES NOW and INDIA TODAY did a fairly good job of purveying domestic news, and one looked forward to the nightly prime time news. Now, however, these  channels have become pathetic caricatures of journalism, what they share with us is their paid "views", not news; their views are dictated by their corporate owners and the PMO, not the public's interest; their undisguised agenda is to praise the government and the ruling party and to run down the Opposition generally, and Rahul Gandhi in particular. The fawning and sycophancy on display every evening would, in fact, be sickening if it were also not so toxic and divisive, inciting bigotry and hatred in equal measure.

If one wishes to master the art of lazy journalism one should study the methods of our English news channels. They make no attempt to deploy reporters in the states to gather news at first hand-that costs money; it is cheaper to subscribe to feeder news agencies, most of whom are also hand maidens of the ruling dispensation. But even their inputs are rarely followed up or reported on- that will require editorial effort and journalistic ability which our star anchors and news editors lack. The easiest and least expensive option, therefore, is to dump the news and jump straightaway into a "Debate" or a "Panel Discussion" in the comfort of an air-conditioned studio in NOIDA.

The subjects for these discussions are carefully curated to ensure that no embarrassment is caused to the powers that be (which are also the powers that see, you see.) So Cockroach party is ignored, as are Rahul Gandhi's visit to, or warnings about, the Great Nicobar project, as are also events held by prominent civil society organisations to protest against govt. policies or practices, or anything that does not show the govt. or its supporting entities in good light. Equally abominable is the fact that, once these over-paid anchors get their fangs into a subject, they stick to them like leeches, refusing to let go until the last morsel of propaganda is extracted from them: the whole of April went into rubbing the TMC loss in Bengal into Mamata Banerjee's face and gloating over the defections from the TMC to the BJP, May was devoted to Hormuz and refighting Operation Sindoor, June was consumed by framing a narrative about the hypocrisy of the Opposition in condemning the Ram Mandir loot even though they never supported the construction of the temple(!), July is dedicated to Mr. Modi receiving more meaningless awards in Indonesia.                                                                                                                             It's as if no other news occurred which was worth mentioning during this period. There has hardly even been a mention of the three most consequential judgments in the last fortnight by the Supreme Court, a High Court and a district court: the right to walk and access footpaths as a fundamental right, that criticism of the government is not a crime, and a rare life conviction of fourteen "gau rakshaks" for  lynching a truck driver in 2022. Each of these judgments has the potential to empower the ordinary citizen and reverse the rot in the system, but for "news" channels they do not merit a mention, let alone an informed discussion.

The "debates" themselves are modelled on the pattern of a jury trial in Russia - the topic is carefully selected to suit the propaganda narrative of the day, the verdict is already decided and conveyed over a secure phone line to these studio mannequins, the panelists consist of assorted spokespersons of political parties, BJP supporters masquerading as "political analysts", some journalists to impart a facade of neutrality, and (in the case of Republic TV) a few sacrificial goats from Pakistan who can be impaled on Arnab Goswami's lance, perhaps for a few shekels.

But the clincher is the "star anchor", the referee who is firmly in the saffron corner, wearing a khaki "katccha" beneath that corporate outfit. In fact, the BJP spokesperson is not really needed, for all the heavy lifting for the ruling party and govt. is done by these anchors. They decide which questions to ask, who is allowed to speak and for how long, whose mike to cut off (on the Parliament model). Instead of being a moderator and leaving the exchange of views to the participants, these opionated anchors monopolise most of the available time, taking over the BJP spokesperson's role, doing all the rebutting, answering, scolding and heckling. The others don't stand a chance! In fact, given that these debates are more like half-encounters on the U.P. police pattern, I am left wondering why any sensible person even agrees to attend these disgusting episodes of journalistic homicide.

This, in a nutshell, is the state of prime time news in Naya Bharat, folks. Ponder over this while I return to Wimbledon, to watch the indefatigable Djokovic take on the inscrutable Sinner, assured that the match is not rigged and the referee is not bought out .