ERRANT THOUGHTS ON REGIME CHANGE AND PEACE BONDS

 The more discerning among my readers would have noticed that in India the flavours of the season change with, well, the season. In July it was the humble cockroach, in August it was the foot-in-the-mouth Chief Justice of India (again), in September it was the redoubtable Tukaram Mundhe. Come the cold edge of October, and the flavour has changed again- it is now "Regime Change." The chill in the air is not due to the approaching winter alone.

This is the new four-letter word these days. Every Whatapp Unkle and Anty  are  talking of nothing else. BJP spokespersons whose English hitherto extended only to "What goes up your father's?" (Tere baap ka kya jaata hai ?) and darbari anchors whose IQs are lower than their TRPs can't get enough of it. The phrase is being tossed around on prime time TV every night like a piece of dung at a dung beetles' convention. It has replaced the Original Sin in the BJP/RSS playbook, and I have no doubt that the BNSS shall be amended very soon to make it a crime, in the company of sedition and treason. Expect the Supreme Court to approve it speedily, for a regime change there is also being talked about in hushed tones.

In most countries regime change would mean a change of government, but not in the mother-in-law of democracy where we don't do things by halves. Here I see multiple regimes being targeted for replacement- the government yes, but also the Election Commission, the Supreme Court, some media conglomerates, the Rasputins in the RSS, the two Gujarati double-engines driving our economy into the billionaire Valhalla, the spurious satraps installed in states by Gyanesh Kumar, the Presiding Officers of our two Houses which now resemble, figuratively speaking, a Gujarat bridge after its collapse. For it has taken a huge cooperative effort to bring this great country to its knees and the credit for it must be generously spread, like the subsidised butter in the Parliament canteen.

To prevent this, the diabolical duo are moving heaven and earth, ITBP and CRPF, Solicitor-General and Judge, Arnab Goswami and Padmaja Joshi, IAS renegades and IFS turncoats, Kangana Runout and Smriti Irani, Sanju Verma and Anand Ranganathan, even goons and parole convicts. But it doesn't appear to be working, for it's not just the cockroaches who have had enough, it's also the dimagi naxals, the urban Naxals, the "gutter generation", the "Khalistani" farmers, parasites, termites, maybe even a bhakt or two who have discovered that their God has feet of clay and knees of jelly when it comes to mentioning China. There's a complete menagerie out there which Vantara would be proud to possess. No amount of pest control measures can get rid of these pesky critters, it appears.

In India, the last resort of wannabe despots and usurpers is no longer politics- it is the Law, which is why it has now been decided to weaponise the "Peace Bond". Initially intended to keep the peace, it is now being employed to keep the power (of the chosen few, of course). The new international border is in Jantar Mantar and Connaught Place, not in Ladakh or Arunachal Pradesh, and so tens of thousands of troops have dug in in our cities. The Chinese and Pakistanis can wait- we  have to save the country from its own citizens first. Meanwhile, if you want to step out of your house or wave the national flag or shout "Give us back our Vote" or take a leak in a public toilet, you first have to sign a Peace Bond, giving an entirely new meaning to RIP. You either rest in peace or are arrested in pieces.

Which leads me to an interesting thought- if citizens can be asked to sign  bonds for keeping the peace (whatever that may mean), then why not ask the minions of the state to sign similar bonds for doing their duty? Like: the Delhi policemen signing a bond to not sexually molest young girls, judges to deliver judgments based on law and not on their future prospects of reemployment, MPs/MLAs to pledge that they would resign if they change parties, Arnab Goswami to stop repeating that crap about "fearless journalism", political parties guaranteeing that they would implement their pre-election manifestos, and so on. THIS would be the real swadeshi amendment to the IPC, not the garbage drafted probably in Nagpur. It would not make India a Hindu Rashtra, of course, but would definitely do much for better governance. And it is the type of bond one could support, at Jantar Mantar or Central Park- when they are notified again as protest sites, of course. I'd be willing to sign a bond for that.

THE G-124 LETTER HAS LET DOWN THE CIVIL SERVICES

 Connoisseurs of humour know that all genuine humour is underlaid with wisdom, which provides the actual punch. And so it was that, when I read the recent open letter issued by 124 retired civil servants defending Gyanesh Kumar and his nefarious doings, I was reminded of the sage words of Maurice Switzer: "It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt."                                                                                            I was not surprised by this epistle, however, for my Whatsapp groups have a dense population of such bureaucrats, closet members of Mr. Modi's tribe. What did surprise me, however, is that for once they chose to speak out (on the wrong side of history, yes, but they did come out of their burrows), because such people are more comfortable in the security of the woodwork and like to hedge their bets. They do not rock boats, they never take a stand, they always worship the rising sun, and they know which side of their bread is buttered. I suspect they were persuaded to say "Aye" by Mr. Modi's gentle persuaders- a few crumbs, loaves and charge-sheets might have been traded- to sign on the dotted lines (not difficult, for it is something they have done for most of their careers).

A word about the signatories to the letter would not be out of place. Most of them are faceless wonders, which is as it should be since their faces have egg, if not worse, all over them by now. A couple have been accused of embezzlement and corruption; one displayed his bigotry and misogyny brazenly at an event in a ladies' college some time back; yet another, now a Chancellor of ,a central University, has been an acolyte of the BJP for a long time; some are working with right-wing organisations like the Vivekanand Foundation and ORG, one is on record stating that he has issued orders under political pressure! Not exactly the kind of "concerned" citizens who can be trusted to objectively comment on the doings of this regime and its puppets like the Election Commission. In short, their credentials are highly suspect.

The letter itself is a manifesto of the ignorant and a charter of obsequiousness. It praises the Election Commission of India for its "historical" achievements (which, needless to say, belong to the past and not the present dispensation), supports SIR as a much-needed exercise, condemns those who are asking for Gyanesh Kumar's resignation, and backs Modi's regime to the hilt. (It has to be the hilt, because they have impaled themselves upon this sacerdotal sword in true hara-kiri style.) The windmill this G24 is tilting at is clearly the letters issued earlier by another group of civil servants, the CCG (Constitutional Conduct Group) which has, over the last ten years, established a sterling reputation for  taking a principled stand on many issues where it felt the government had violated constitutional values, rights and provisions. Maybe the heat was getting to someone in the kitchen?

I shall not try to counter and expose the fallacies, downright untruths, lack of logic and distortion of facts in the G124 letter: that has already been done very ably and comprehensively by MG Devasahayam, a senior retired IAS officer, with facts and figures in an article in The Wire (Ex-civil servants defending SIR are wrong) on 16th October 2026.

Nothing, however, proves how wrong these letter writers are than the conduct of the Election Commission itself over the last few days since the second round of protests in Delhi. It has practically admitted its guilt and culpability in the SIR fiasco. By gradually (and quietly) rolling back and reversing some of the draconian and illegal provisons of this exercise of exclusion it has validated the charges against it. Just to recapitulate, in the last couple of weeks it has taken the following decisions:

* The mischievous declaration attached to Form 6 has been removed.

* Access to ECINET has been restored for the EROs (but not yet, strangely, for the Tribunal judges in Bengal!)

* A technical Committee has been set up to audit the suspect ECINET software.

* It has admitted that the two Election Commissioners had indeed written to the Cabinet Secretary about the irregularities in the body.

*A cap has now been imposed on the number of infamous Forms 7 which can be submitted by one person.

*A special drive has been started to include the left out/deleted voters in the states where SIR has concluded.

* In the 17 such states an SSR (Special Summary Revision) has been initiated, to enroll voters who have turned 18 and had been left out of the SIR.

*Machine readable voter rolls in pdf format shall now be provided to all candidates.

*List of deletions/additions shall be provided to all political parties.

* The ECI has implicitly admitted that it does not have any list or details of Amit Shah's "ghuspaitiyas" or termites (the oft stated reason for SIR given by Gyanesh Kumar) among the 130 million deleted voters.

This is as comprehensive a guilty plea as any ever submitted by any accused to any court. For these actions/ information was precisely what the the entire Opposition and civil society activists had been demanding for months but the imperious Gyanesh Kumar had been refusing to provide, instead ordering the LOP to furnish an affidavit first! His admission now strengthens the belief that all this was done (for the BJP) to win the elections in Bengal and Bihar. Wait for that admission too, as the noose around the ECI tightens. 

Finally, the G124 letter is not a legitimate expression of differing views or free speech, as its apologists may claim. It is an expression of support and encouragement for authoritarianism, intolerance, electoral cleansing, denial of fundamental rights and exclusion, and no civilised nation can countenance this kind of rhetoric. It is dangerous for democracy and the rule of law. It has tarnished the reputation of the civil services. For, at the end of the day, any one who supports wrong doing is just as guilty of it as the prime mover himself. In the words of Nelson Mandela, in an appeal to his people issued from a prison cell:

"Will you come along with us, or are you going to cooperate with the government in its efforts to suppress the claims and aspirations of your own people? "

The people of India deserve an answer from this rump of civil servants.

AN APPOINTMENT NOT GIVEN, A TRUST FORFEITED

 The Chief Justice of India refused to meet the Leader of the Opposition on the 12th of this month and hear his grievances, even though one of his predecessors had no problems about inviting the Prime Minister to his residence for a pooja and a cosy tete-e-tete. This snub was both unfortunate and expected.

Unfortunate, because the CJI is not another divine, non-biological being but a part of the system. This system has become dysfunctional,  and the LOP simply wanted to convey this to him. The LOP has as much of a constitutional status as a CJI, even though their roles differ. The CJI would not have compromised his much vaunted, but increasingly doubted, political "neutrality" if he had had the courtesy to meet the LOP, listen to his grievances, perhaps accept a memorandum or two, share a cup of tea, and bid him "Auf Wiedersehen" or "We shall meet at Phillipi." No one expected him to act on the grievances, of course, since many of them pertain to his own court, but at least the window-dressing of democratic accessibility and an "independent" judiciary would have been preserved. It might even have restored some of the trust that large sections of the public no longer have in the Court.

But, as I said, the refusal was expected, for the simple reason that the Supreme Court no longer has the moral authority and people's trust to act as an honest broker (or arbiter) between the government and the Opposition/ public. It had started shedding this constitutional teflon long before Justice Suryakant's tenure, beginning with its orders on Rafale, Pegasus, Hindenberg, Ram Mandir, Electoral bonds, Umar Khalid, to name just a few. But the molting has become more pronounced over the last year or so. There is a perception that it has been consistently  siding with the executive and Election Commission in spite of scientific evidence, ground realities and public demands: it gave a clean chit to the use of EVMs, made a statistical mockery of the VVPAT verification, ignored the selective use of the Model Code of Conduct in favour of the ruling party, stayed silent at the dubious rejection of nomination papers of opposition candidates (which has now been upgraded to blatant intimidation and arrests), the use of police to "persuade" some voters to stay at home during polling, turned a blind eye to the egregious change/delay/ mismatch in voter counts, looked on  as the Election Commission repeatedly approved the breaking and hijacking of opposition parties and governments by the BJP, preferred humiliation to contempt action when the Committee set up by it to select the CEC was thrown into the dustbin by the Modi govt. Each and every mischief of these types was brought to its notice through various petitions (which, the CJI reportedly told Rahul Gandhi, was the kosher way of approaching the Court !), all usually rejected with the contempt they deserved or put on the backburner for a more propitious time. In fact, the Court occasionally even frowned on those who filed these petitions and wasted its time, drawing upon its vast knowledge of zoology to term them cockroaches, flies etc.

The nadir was reached when it did nothing- NOTHING- for over a year to reign in an election commission which had gone rogue with its brutal SIR (Special Intensive Revision) which has consigned 130 million voters to the twilight zone between statelessness and deportation. Worse, it greenlighted the politically partisan exercise in May this year, incentivising the ECI to redouble its efforts to rob the Indian citizen of his fundamental rights. Therefore, now that massive protests have erupted all over the country against SIR and the CEC, the public appears to have lost confidence and trust in the Court, forcing it to march on the Court itself, a first in our history. To put it bluntly and unkindly, it is now seen as a part of the problem, not of the solution.

With all gate-keepers of democracy and justice- the higher judiciary, Parliament, Election Commission, National Human Rights Commission, the media - abdicating their constitutional duties and oaths and becoming irrelevant, India's citizenry has occupied the space that genuinely belongs to it, and which no wannabe despot can take away from it: India's roads, streets, parks, open spaces. Here too, the Supreme Court has not exactly covered itself with glory: it suggested removing Jantar Mantar as a protest venue,  initially failed to take any action against against the Delhi police for its excesses on the young protesters, including girls, journalists, advocates, passers-by, students. When public and international outrage finally forced it to issue some directions, these were hedged with so many caveats, conditionalities, escape clauses like "in accordance with law", "provided", and "however," that the police treated them as cosmetic inconveniences. As I write this they continue to beat, detain, sexually manhandle, protect their hired goondas, shut down half the city. Today, a one-stripe constable at Jantar Mantar effectively wields more effective power than the Chief Justice Of India- or so it seems to most citizens.

THIS is the background and context - the total breakdown of law and order, denial of constitutional protections and rights, evisceration of the values of democracy, subversion of institutions, the rampant use of sovereign violence, the defiance of judicial orders - in which the LOP wished to meet the CJI on the 12th of this month. The Supreme Court is the last port of call for the citizens of a failing ship of state, and it does not behove the Chief Justice to  wash his hands of the mess by saying "Law and order is not my domain." Yes, in normal circumstances it is not, but when the pretext of law and order is used to suppress the people's voice, to inflict needless violence. to shut down a city, to deprive citizens of their basic rights, to murder democracy itself- where else can the people turn to for legal redress but the Supreme Court? Such a moment is not the time to split hairs about "administrative" and "judicial" side, as the CJI has sought to do; he should look at the "justice" side. For, in the ultimate analysis, if the highest court in the land cannot assure justice for the citizens, it becomes another legal fiction and might as well be wound up. The Constitution has given the judges of the higher judiciary extraordinary powers, privileges and protection, to safeguard the rights of the people, not the government of the day. If this authority is instead used  to allow authoritarian over-reach, then this is a breach of the trust the people have reposed in the Court, a violation of a sovereign contract, and they- We The People- have the inherent right to enforce accountability and even demand resignations. That moment in time has arrived. 

The Hon'ble Chief Justice should have given the Leader of the Opposition an appointment. It was the latter's right and the former's duty. It was also, perhaps, a democratic nation's last call to remain one, in a peaceful manner.

It's still not too late to do the right thing, Your Lordship. Otherwise, to take a phrase from the Bible, On your own head be it.

THE UPSIDE OF BEING A DODO

                              THE  UPSIDE  OF  BEING  A  DODO

 As I find it a little more difficult to get out of bed each succeeding autumn morning, my mind  (what's left of it, that is) inevitably wanders to thoughts of ageing. The process is very gradual and kind of sneaks up on you: the cells stop multiplying but continue dividing, not unlike the BJP, the telomeres stop communicating with each other a-la Mr. Gyanesh Kumar and his colleagues the joints protest loudly like Mr. Kejriwal at any sudden move, the memory starts playing tricks like it does frequently with Mr. Rahul Gandhi on the stump, and one begins to speak like Sashi Tharoor i.e. in words that no one understands, certainly not my sons, nephews and nieces weaned on the two syllable patois of Twitter and Instagram. So slow is this process, however- like being murdered by a  four toed sloth- that one is not even aware of it.

   And then one day- WHAM!- it suddenly hits you full on the geezer. It can happen in different ways- getting up in the morning feeling half dead and having to check the obituary columns to determine whether one is still alive or dead, that alarming ECG report when you take out that new health insurance policy, the moment when your son is blessed- is that the right word these days?- with his second child or third divorce. It can even happen as it did to Groucho Marx: you are standing grieving at the graveside of your batchmate, all alone because everyone else has left, when a chap sidles up to you and whispers: " Not much point in going back home, is there?" My own epiphanic moment, however, came in an entirely different and discomfiting way.

   I usually travel by Metro since I need to reduce my family's carbon footprint which rivals that of Bigfoot or Godzilla, thanks to my wife Neerja. I seem to have spent my entire life following in her trail like an excited puppy: earlier it used to be so that I could spoon up the random smile, the casual word of endearment, the fleeting expression of affection- all too precious to be left discarded by the roadside. Now, however, I do it so that I can switch off the fan, lights, AC, geyser or heater in her wake: she NEVER puts them off because God himself once said " Let there be light!" and she's a deeply religious person. She HAS to say hullo to her mom, sister and bevy of friends six days in a week, and- you guessed it- it can't be done over the phone because Airtel maytell everyone about it, and in any case they all have to see who is wearing which type of Banarsi saree that day. So she burns the hydrocarbons like Mr. Mohammad bin Salman is giving it away for free in order to atone for blowing away Mr. Khashoggi, not a recommended use of wind power.

   So here I was on the Delhi Metro one day; it was crowded and I was standing in the aisle hanging on to a strap like yesterday's washing. Suddenly a pretty young girl got up from her seat and offered it to me with the words( I shall remember them till my dying breath): " Uncle, please take the seat." UNCLE ! When a beautiful member of the fair sex calls you Uncle you just know that there's no point in going on living; it's the kiss of death and you now belong with the dinosaurs. It was at that exact epiphanic moment that I realised that I was now a prime candidate for the geriatric ward. I had boarded the train as a sprightly 75 year old, but deboarded at Mandi House a broken relic. My metamorphosis was complete: I now belonged to the ages.

   One year later, however, after twelve months of this fossilized existence I must concede that things are not all that bad: being a dodo has its upside. I no longer mind the aching joints when I wake up every morning because they indicate that at least I'm still alive. The best thing about getting old is that all those things you couldn't have when you were young you no longer want, and therefore don't miss them any more. I no longer fret and worry where my wife goes of an evening, just so that I don't have to go along with her. Mrs Sitharaman gives me an additional Rs. 50000 exemption on my income ( before he mops it all back with incessant cesses, of course), and the Railways give me a concession on the fare even though the train is 12 hours late and/or cancelled. The govt. respectfully refers to me as a "senior citizen" before asking me to line up for four hours in various queues. And most important of all, I'm gradually moving out of that lethal " MeToo" zone which has felled many a perpendicular stalwart, if you get my drift. Though, if accused of molestation, I might well be tempted to follow the example of that zippy 81 year old who was recently accused of doing just that. Standing in the dock he could barely conceal his pride at having been conferred this honour at his age, and when asked by the judge, pleaded guilty! The judge, of course, was having none of this and fined him a thousand rupees for lying under oath ! Or that other old dodger who was approached by this hooker outside a bar who propositioned him thus: " Hi, dad, I'm a great believer in barter: what do you say to some sex for some beer?" The ancient geezer thought for a long moment and replied: " What kinda beer you got?" Ah, the arrogance of old age! As Oscar Wilde almost said: the young know everything, the middle-aged suspect everything, and the old don't give a damn about anything!

   And that, dear reader, is the problem with the kiss of death: you're dead but don't know it. The walking dead.

 

INTERVIEW WITH KARAN THAPAR- "THE LAST SKY."

 I was interviewed to day by Karan Thapar on my new book THE LAST SKY- COUNTDOWN FOR AN ENDANGERED PLANET. I am giving below the Youtube link to the interview for those who may be interested in viewing it.

 https://youtu.be/qIDDTooeYqg

CONVERTING A STATE INTO REAL ESTATE.

 

[ A slightly shorter version of this blog was published in THE TRIBUNE on 27.09.2026 under the heading HOW LOOPHOLES ARE CONVERTING A STATE INTO REAL ESTATE].

In response to a recent blog of mine about unregulated constructions in Himachal, a discerning reader commented that he had done an online search for available properties in the state, and to his horror, found that 23450 properties were advertised for sale/ rent/ lease between just Shimla and Narkanda, a stretch of just 90 kms or so. Even allowing for double counting, these figures tell a tale which our policy makers would do well to listen to, and heed. For what they tell us is that faulty policies, lack of vision or understanding of economics are making Himachal prime real estate, up for grabs by whoever has the money and connections to exploit the system. But some background first.

Land is a precious commodity in Himachal, for the utilisable land is less than 15% of its geographical area- 8 lakh hectares against a total of 55.67 lakh hectares, the rest being forests, "gair mumkin" or areas above the tree line where nothing grows; the actual area under agriculture is even less- just about 5.25 lakh hectares. Farming is almost at subsistence level, the average land holding is 0.94 hectares (in Punjab it is 3.64 ha), small and marginal farmers hold 89% of the arable land. Industry is almost non-existent and the state has one of the highest unemployment rates in the country. For all these reasons , as Nirmanyu Chauhan and Divyanshu Thakur put it so eloquently in their article in the WIRE (8.3.2026), land in this state is not just a commodity, it is a source of dignity, livelihood and autonomy. And security.

Himachal's first Chief Minister, YS Parmar, had the vision to realise this and therefore took steps to ensure that Himachalis were not deprived of their lands by rich and exploitative outside elements; he brought in the Tenancy and Land Reforms Act in 1974, Section 118 of which imposes severe restrictions on non- Himachalis buying land  in the state. They can do so only after obtaining prior approval of the government. Subsequent Chief Ministers, sadly, have lacked the same foresight and have introduced so many exemptions and loopholes in the law that now any smart lawyer or purchaser can buy any extent of land in the state for any purpose. And this is happening on a colossal scale, as the Shimla- Narkanda figure in para one proves. In just the last three years 1494 approvals have been granted, but this is only the proverbial tip of the ice-berg, the real mass of the problem lies below.

The actual transfer of lands to, and purchase by, outsiders would be many times the number of approvals officially cited above. This is because of the many exemptions provided to the operation of Section 118: no approval is required for a society consisting of agriculturists, flats built in urban areas, houses/flats taken on lease, RERA approved builder developments. These exemptions are actually loopholes and have virtually thrown up the whole of Himachal to land sharks and builders. In addition, "benami" land transfers are another way of avoiding the rigours of the law.                                                                                                 As living conditions in north Indian cities and metros steadily worsen, more and more people there are now investing in second homes in places like Uttarakhand and Himachal, especially post Covid. The threat now is to rural Himachal and its original residents. Land prices have sky-rocketed, and the Himachali landowner, unable to resist the lure of quick money, is being dispossessed of his ancestral lands on an ever increasing scale by hotels, home-stays, builder developments, resorts. This is changing the very architecture of the mountains, replacing green cover with concrete, effecting the demographics (as in the "ghost" villages of Uttarakhand), distorting local cultures. At risk is not only the geology but the very identity of the state.

                    

         [Flats for sale in Barog. Recreating the hills in concrete.

         Photo Credit: The Tribune]

The state's policy makers must look at the long term implications of such land transfers; it is time to review Section 118 of the HP Tenancy and Land Reforms Act to make it more restrictive. No approval should be given under this section for construction of hotels and  resorts in rural areas- they are ruining the hinterlands (just as they have the cities), one has only to visit the Tirthan valley, the Jalori pass to Jibhi stretch, the once pristine Barog saddle, the Mashobra-Naldehra section to see for oneself how pastoral Himachal is being converted into a concrete mess of multi storeyed structures There should be a complete ban on Section 118 approvals for real estate developments, housing societies, multi storey apartment blocks or villas. All the existing exemptions/loopholes in the Act need to be reviewed, especially the ones pertaining to RERA projects, purchase of flats, and leases. Some new curbs need to be introduced in the law, for example, a ban on purchase of lands belonging to Scheduled Castes, Scheduled Tribes and BPL families (as in Uttarakhand) to prevent their exploitation by deep pocket outsiders and land sharks. Except for specific projects approved by the government, non-Himachalis who wish to purchase land in the state should be required to establish some connection to the state, whether by way of service, business or family for a minimum number of years, to qualify.

There would, of course, be legal considerations involved in adopting this course of action. There is bound to be resistance from some panchayats as land values will drop, from politicians egged on by land dealers and real estate companies, from the builder and property dealer lobbies, from influential people in the metros looking for a piece of the mountains as their own premium condos are engulfed by pollution and civic  collapse. Fortunately, the HP High Court at least has grasped the gravity of the matter; in a recent order it has castigated the government for allowing the concretisation and denudation of the green cover of Barog. It has sought details of approvals accorded under Sec.118, sanction of building plans, number of trees felled on private land, and has even warned that it would not hesitate to order an investigation by the CBI.                  Anyone who loves Himachal and its peoples will welcome this order, and would hope that this is the first of many to follow. The government should stop playing politics and making money, and should realise that this is a matter of survival of the mountains and the people to whom they belong. The state cannot be allowed to become one huge resort or gated community.

ROLL OVER, BEETHOVEN ! (and RSS)

 All the signs of the Second Coming, as foretold in the Bible, are visible: wars and conflicts, natural disasters, lawlessness and moral decay of society. Increasingly, however, it would appear that the event shall happen, not in Bethlehem or Palestine, but in India. A new God is about to be born here. The omens and clues have been there for some time: the presiding over the "sengol" in a new Parliament, the displacing of the Shankaracharyas at the inauguration of the new Ram Mandir in Ayodhya, the Shivji type of meditative posture in a Kedarnath cave, the non-biological claims, the direct communion with the Gods. And if anyone still had any doubts, the recent birthday celebrations of the prime candidate for the job should dispel them like tear gas at Jantar Mantar. He was worshipped like a God incarnate by the faithful, the powerful, the 37% of the country who have been ideologically lobotomised, "diyas" lit for his long life, "bhajans" sung in his praise, I believe even temples erected for his eternal exaltation and glorification.

It appears to me that the stage is set for a new religion,Moditva, to replace Hindutva. The latter has served its purpose: religions must evolve to suit the zeitgeist of the times, new Gods must be brought in as lateral entry to strengthen the divine cadre, the scriptures must be reinterpreted to conform to the new ruling and fashionable ideology of the head priests, the loaves of office will be the new "prasad" on offer, the hosannas will now be digitized through EVMs. These are tectonic shifts in the religious firmament, the old deities can no longer meet the new job description, their CVs are dated. A new God, a new religion are needed. Mr. Modi and Moditva will fit the bill nicely, thank you.

Expect the proselytization in favour of Moditva to begin in earnest now, notwithstanding the many anti-conversion laws that bedevil other religions.. Actually, this job is already half done with Universities and colleges, "autonomous" institutions, the civil services and the top brass of the defense forces, Bollywood, the media, RWAs, already brought into the fold; the judiciary needs a few more strategically prodded Collegium postings to be fully baptised. The rest shall be done by Apostle Gyanesh Kumar.

There may, however, be a problem with this Roll Over, RSS ! moment. Will this hoary organisation, founded on the old Hindutva ethos, simply play ball and turn belly up? Or will it see Mr. Modi's Second Coming as its own Final Going ? And is the new Godhood even possible without the RSS singing hymns and psalms to it ? These questions shall be answered, methinks, not at Phillipi , but in Uttar Pradesh next year. Till then, dear reader, join a choir and start practicing. There is much singing to be done yet.

*                              *                               *                                    *                       *               

The SIR (Special Intensive Revision) started as a catastrophe in Bihar and Bengal but has now become a farce in Delhi. India is perhaps the only country in the world (outside the totalitarian ambit) where even retired judges, an ex-Vice President, a serving Election Commissioner, Chief Ministers of states, a retired Army Chief, retired Ambassadors, a former Deputy Prime Minister, the Chief of its premier federal investigative agency-all pillars of the nation- have to prove their voter status and citizenship. Even though they have all voted in the past and have adorned the highest posts in the land! They are in the company of 4 million other Delhi voters, almost 40% of the existing voter list. Who says we are one of the world's leading unequal nations ? With his indiscriminate carpet bombing of voters Mr. Gyanesh Kumar has not only struck a blow for equity, but has also reduced our population by 130 million, as Mr. SY Quraishi has pointed out. Expect the Ministry of (Fudged) Statistics to rework our GDP and per Capita Income as an offering to the new deity.

There are, of course, many explanations for this farce. AI experts are of the view that this was bound to happen - with the Election Commission itself having gone rogue, it was inevitable that the AI agents in its algorithms too would turn rogue. Others believe that this was a false flag operation, the result of our close ties with Israel-by deliberately targeting the creme-de-creme of past and present governments, the ECI is debunking the charge that the exercise is meant to delete minorities and vulnerable sections who do not vote for the BJP. Can anything be more democratic, transparent and equitable ? A third explanation is that this is a shot across the bows for some- behave your self, or out you go from the voter roll and into Bangladesh !!  Our village idiot offered a fourth perspective- that this was Mr. Gyanesh Kumar's first move to, well, move into Rashtrapati Bhavan- a message that he holds all the cards, or votes, and that a  mere thirty pieces of silver will not do for him. But I prefer the prognostication of our hamlet's second eminence, the village drunkard who's steeped to his eyeballs with both booze and the latest news- viz. that Gyanesh Kumar, in the light of the latest developments, will be the first sacrificial offering to the new presiding deity of Moditva. He doesn't know it yet, but the cockroaches do, and they've been around for a long time, haven't they?

Which is the correct explanation? I don't know, and I really don't care. All I know is that a farce is no laughing matter. As Samuel Taylor Coleridge said: Farce is nearer tragedy in its essence than comedy is.